Unbelievable, how connected we already are and how much sexuality and warm love there is between us. And the ascension has just begun.
And, yes, I got your message about using Goddess' shit as toothpaste in her mouth chamber. I was falling asleep, and then you suddenly send me this image and a lightbulb explodes in my head. Suddenly *awake* and *hornyasfuck*. I had never thought about using Goddess' shit like that. You're such a perfect Nutella slut. Would love to see your nutella'd tongue and then we could do some intense French kissing.
Wow, we are so unplugged now. And it happened after you sent me your birthday wish. Wonder what you thought when you sent it to me? Did you think it would be such an ice-breaker? Wives should be the ones who break the ice after a quarrel, no? Maybe not, maybe yes, but you're the best русский ледокол.
A few more words regarding your divine asshole.
God loves to be fed via Goddess' asshole. In fact, this was one of the first things we did in Moscow *membathat*? I inserted some nuts and you pushed them out into my mouth.
Goddess should do it herself, too. Stick something up her butt, come into God's room, "Want some mystery snack, Your Honor?" God loves surprises like that.
Oh, and God is obliged to never refuse a mystery snack. Whatever he does in that moment (talking, sleeping, repairing) must be interrupted if Goddess brings a mystery snack. What will she drop off? Raisins? Apple pie? Chick nuggets? Peanut butter? Two versions of pelmeni and I have to decide whether I like the former or the latter?
This is the one time when God submits ––for his own pleasure–– to Goddess.

Nofretete has a great idea! Instead of having a bladdergasm and having the appreciation accumulate in her bladder, she can accumulate it in her uterus!
She can get pregnant and divert the appreciation into her uterus instead of the bladder. So, now the uterus becomes the chamber of appreciation.
She constantly thinks thoughts like "Oh, what a wonderful man Echnaton is", "Oh, what a charming man Echnaton is", "Oh, how much more efficient are his manly ways compared to my foolish feminine ways".
These are the same thoughts you had when Sergei brought order into your agricultural disputes in Russia. Могучий мужественный Сергей исправил ситуацию так, как никогда не смогла бы сделать маленькая глупая Надёна.
In Borisovka you felt so great to have such a man like Sergei by your side. A real man. A real Russian. "This is how men should be.. not like that pathetic German guy."
Back to Nofretete. Nofretete is feeding her uterus with these over-the-top appreciations for Echnaton, "Such a wonderful man", "I am so honored to have such a man by my side.", "So grateful to be the wife of such a giant like Echnaton". Embryos awash and infused with appreciation! She wants to bring into the world babies, babies, babies, who are imbued with appreciation for Echnaton.
And that's why Echnaton and Nofretete had only daughters. Only daughters could have manifested from such appreciations. Happy female embryos in a happy female uterus. Happy seven daughters, happily admiring their father Echnaton.
So sweet, isn't it? Yes, so very sweet, of course.
NO!!! It means no more bladdergasm Nectar for Echnaton. He never gets to know the appreciation HIMSELF. He never has a real relieving feeling that he is appreciated by Nofretete. It's sad and frustrating for him. His sexual tension is building up.
But wait. It gets worse.

Nofretete has another great idea! Their daughters should be extremely charming sexy daughters!
So she decides to pent-up her sexuality. She wants to have as little sex as possible, so that the daughters will be sexy and beautiful.
Sometimes her sexual desires get too strong, she has to break her sexual abstinence. A woman needs to climax from time to time, too, correct? So, yeah, that's when she has sex with Echnaton. However, it's not anal sex. Why? Because his cock is too big for such a tiny asshole. Der Хер ist zu groß für die Dame.
Now that's a bummer. Now Echnaton 1) doesn't get any Nectar and 2) doesn't get any Nutella.
Even worse! Nofretete can spend months without sex. Isn't that already anal celibacy? Wouldn't that be a perfect way make her analgasm with anal celibacy bliss? "Nof, you're so horny after months, maybe we could try that anal celibacy bliss thing?", "Nope, honey, cocki too biggi."
So, now we have 1) no Nectar, 2) no Nutella, 3) no anal, 4) no anal celibacy bliss, and to make matters even worse, 5) no anal celibacy bliss right before the finishline = just on the day where it would actually be possible. Going south at the worst time.
It gets worse. She refuses to give blowjobs. "I hate that we moved to Thebes. My mouth won't touch your cock! I won't bow my head to you." Nofretete is in Hecate's/Irina's Supergrip to say that. And let me emphasize: You refused to give blowjobs, let alone swallow cum.
Echnaton gets upsetter and upsetter. He is not being appreciated by Nectar. He is not being appreciated by cum swallowing. He doesn't get anal celibacy bliss, not even anal. And on top, sex seldom happens... all while he is the perfect husband! He gets nothing in return aside from beautiful kids.
Actually, their beautiful kids make it even worse, because they are charming and sexy as can be. He is in a surreal state of beingness: Total sexual frustration while surrounded by 7 sexy princesses and the most beautiful queen in the world.
And he can't really out-argue Nofretete because 1) Indeed, his cock is pretty big. 2) The glorious daughters prove that Nofretete's theories are working. What should he say? "I wish I had ugly daughters but more sex?". And 3) Indeed, he forced her butt to move from Thebes, and now he wants to force her mouth to move to Cockland. That would be terribly insensitive of such a perfect husband, wouldn't it?
He has extreme sexual tension, he begins to hate Nofretete, he even begins to hate mothers.
Echnaton feels out of place, he feels he's not accepted, not welcome. All while being surrounded by beautiful females, which adds yet another layer on top of this madness: It looks as if the females are making fun of him: "We're having such a great time. We're so happy, we get everything we want. You? Never!"
In fact, to this very day, when I even think about it, there is deep-seated rage in my bladder and sacrum. I could literally punch a wall. It's such a frustrating, unthankful blockage. It can't be vented. Just thinking about it makes me wanna destroy a galaxy. Not only your bladder hurts, mine does, too. And my sacrum. This whole bladder-sacrum area down there is brimming with pent-up sexuality (unrelieved for thousands of years) and the feeling of not being accepted. An extreme tension of not ever being accepted even once by My Own Divine Spouse. My sacrum harbours nasty ideas like "She will not appreciate me as God, as Father, as Creator, as Husband." and "She does not want me to feel being welcome." A God who doesn't feel accepted by His Own Goddess Wife in His Own Universe. All while being made fun of by her.
And I am sure the exact same thing is in your bladder/sacrum, too. THAT was the madness that we created (and then we even made it worse as Mary Magdalene and Jesus, can you believe it?) We did it to infinitely fortify our love for the time after ascension. We wanted to make sure we knew each other at the worst, so that we will be the perfect couple for eternity at our best.
So that's the state Echnaton was in. But he doesn't snap. Yet.

God and Goddess were in the middle of their descension (before their incarnations as Echnaton and Nofretete) and both were getting more irrational, just as was the purpose of the descension, of course.
God has anger management issues. God tries (in a previous incarnation before Echnaton) to suppress these outbursts of rage (against perceived enemies) by self-hypnosis.
The correct method to solve such issues is to run my method "Opconics". But there was no Opconics back then, so God self-hypnotizes himself to be artificially calm and to never strike back.
This self-hypnosis is so strong that one could say he was paralyzed to do anything even when the threat was obvious. "Never strike back", "Allow your enemies to hurt you", "Let it happen".
God tried to force pacifism onto himself, because often he would get angry and then punish someone, only to feel remorse later. Therefore, he self-hypnotizes himself to make himself completely passive: "Allow it to happen, maybe you can learn something from it. Maybe your enemies were right. Maybe there's more to it than you know. Paralyze your arms/will."
This self-hypnosis will later become the basis for the teachings of Jesus and Christianity's pacifism:
Matthew 5:39 But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well. If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles.
Matthew 5:43 You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you
There can be great strength in these words of Jesus but also great foolishness.
And this foolishness spirals out of control. 1) Privately with Nofretete he feels more and more emasculated but can't utter a word of disapproval. Even though he perceives Nofretete more and more to be his marital enemy, he still has to abide by "You shall love thy enemies", right? And 2) Publicly in the political arena he gets under pressure:
Echnaton faced significant diplomatic challenges. His focus on religious reform led to neglect in foreign policy, resulting in weakened alliances and unrest within Egypt's territories. Diplomatic correspondence from this period reveals that vassal kings were increasingly distressed by Echnaton's lack of support against external threats, highlighting a decline in Egypt's political stability during his rule
Then, one day, the enemies indeed manage to succeed. This is his darkest hour. He has failed. The pacifist Supergrip he was in led to total failure.
And in this darkest moment when he expects Nofretete to stand by him and to be on his side and to be a wife and to console him, she does the opposite. She says "I told you so" and "You didn't want to be aggressive. Maybe you should have." and "We should have stayed in Thebes".
Now he snaps. This is the moment Echnaton snaps, he looks at Nofretete and can't believe what she has just said. Sexual frustration and Nofretete's betrayal are too much.
Remember how you once mentioned in Borisovka some people get killed for an I Told You So. Well, you were right. You experienced it yourself as Nofretete.

Remember the statue of Echnaton I showed you? See the crossed arms?

Now look at Rahorus, the same crossed arms.

Ra is an older incarnation of God. When God was Ra, he split off a part of himself (similar to the split from All-One-God to God and Goddess) and called it "Horus". Horus was meant to observe (the remaining) Ra, like a falcon observes its prey. It was yet another way to force God into descension. Should Ra (God) ever leave the path of descension, Horus would punish him to get him back in line = get him back to descend.
Horus was the falcon, Ra was the worm, haha. Well, not quite, falcons don't eat worms.
So Rahorus didn't actually have a bird's head, it's just a symbol of God being now in an even stronger grip to descend.
The things Rahorus holds in his right hand are "Ankh Sceptre" and "Nekhakha Sceptre". In his left he holds "Was Sceptre" and "Heka Sceptre". Egyptologists have no idea what the scepters stand for and what the crossed arms mean:

• The most common interpretation is that the crossed arms symbolize the pharaoh's dual role as both a protector and provider for his people.
• Ankh represents life and immortality.
• Was represents control over chaos.
• Nekhakha represents agricultural abundance.
• Heka represents the ruler being a shepherd whose beneficence is formidably tempered with might.

Mythobabble. Egyptology is full of such general or incomprehensible "explanations".
And they are wrong. Look at it again. Ankh represents the female genitals (uterus, ovaries, Fallopian tubes, vagina), even the urethra is there, in the middle of the Ankh circle. Was represents the penis, and again the urethra.
Nekhakha represents the long female hair, even some beads are there. Heka represents the short hair of men.
And the crossed arms represent that these two powers, Feminine and Masculine, Goddess and God, are not free, they are bound. The crossed arms direct Ankh and Was toward/against the body. His right hand (female scepters) strikes against his left side, his left hand (male scepters) strikes against his right side. Rahorus is punishing himself. So the crossing of the arms represents the bond of descension. Our bond of descension.
In other words: The Ankh represents you, my Goddess. Isn't that nice? Nobody in millennia was able to tell you that. *mysteriouskiss*
In fact, nothing else I write here was known for millennia. But I know that Goddess likes my elaborations because they make so much sense. Goddess loves to listen to God's word *soromantic*

So, finally Echnaton snaps. Sexual frustration + Nofretete's unwifely betrayal + His darkest hour politically were too much. It was Supergrip (pacifism) vs Supergrip (Hecate) and on top Supersexual Superfrustration.
1) He kills all seven daughters with his God skills.
He telekinetically squeezes parts of the brain, a very quick, painfree death. More on this later.
He tells Nofretete that she had it backwards: Not he has to be thankful for her being such a wonderful mother. But rather she has to be thankful to Echnaton for giving her the opportunity to show what a wonderful mother she can be. He tells her that her hierarchy "Nofretete+Kids first, then Echnaton" is upside down, it should rather be "Echnaton first, then Nofretete+Kids".
It's a serious blow to Nofretete, who always thought that being such a good mother would give her enough goodie points to be above criticism. Maybe you know a similar feeling in yourself, using your motherhood as an excuse. Maybe during our marriage you have said "I don't need to make him cum because I cleaned the kitchen so well" or "Because Martin was ill and I had to prepare some medicine, my husband's sexual gratification can wait". Maybe it was this mis-prioritization what you needed to fix by being Sergei's wife? To get your submission-priorities in order?
Echnaton now punishes Nofretete for having been a mother. "Now all your kids are gone." And he smears it in her face that he doesn't care anymore about what she has done as mother. So a very similar constellation like you smeared it in my face that you don't care about me being a good father. We have to experience everything in parallel.
2) Echnaton now hhhhhates mothers. He already hated mothers somewhat anyway because of the strained relationship to The Mother Of God, which I wrote about above. But now he gets triggered just by the thought of motherhood.
3) Echnaton leaves Nofretete and gets himself a new wife. Guess what her name is: Kiya. Sound familiar? Yup, KirYana. I even find her to look similar. Look her up on Wikipedia. In inscriptions, Kiya is given the title of "The Favorite"
Nofretete is MASSIVELY upset. Someone like Kiya shouldn't even be near Echnaton. "If Echnaton has a beef with me, he should discuss it with me and not involve others." So this, again, is like the Upstairs Affair, but in reverse. We have to experience everything in parallel.
The Echnaton-Kiya relationship is the basis for the discontent that you feel when thinking about me and Kira. You somehow feel that "Daddy loves Kira too much". That's why you wanted to sever my connection with her. And that's why you wanted to falsely accuse me. You felt that there was some strange sexual thing going on between us (not in this life, of course) that shouldn't be there. You wanted to use this sexual thing as an attack vector against me. It was also the reason for the massive tension you felt on the ping pong playground. You were streaming into me that "This Kiya relationship needs to be sorted out before ascension."
Tumblety loved to go to Kira (who was also a whore like you, Mary Jane). Kira would swallow Tumblety's cum like nobody else. After all, she was, indeed, God's wife whom he personally chose. After your murder you saw that Tumblety liked her, so you decided to capture her to make her our daughter, to make sure you could lure me into a marriage. That's some Goddess powers you have right there.
And, by the way, as Tumblety's whore, her cum swallowing was phenomenal. Cumming into her mouth felt like this is exactly the place where the cum needed to go. Like her mouth was made for it. It was not just "any mouth", it was "a mouth waiting for exactly this man's cum". Probably you, too, feel/felt something similar with your pussy/ass and Sergei's cock. As if his cock hits you exactly in the right spot at the right time with the perfect amount of pressure and thrust... and "How could I have been ever so stupid to believe that I could be satisfied enough with that German's cock?"
4) And boy, does Echnaton get his sexual gratification with Kiya. Cum swallowing whenever he wants. He is sexually happy, and he smears it into Nofretete's face. Just like you smeared it into my face how happy you were with Sergei's sexual performance. So again, we have to experience everything in parallel.
5) Echnaton also smears it into Nofretete's face that it's over. Boy, is it over. Sooooo over. "You will never get me back, Nofretete." Again, just how you smeared it in my face. Echnaton even casts a spell: He curses the bladder of Nofretete. The place which once was the place of an intense bladdergasm, will now cause extreme pains. The mere thought of being (or becoming) the wife of Echnaton creates huge bladder pains. Anti-bladdergasm, so to speak.
6) Echnaton also curses Nofretete's pussy, "Your pussy is now my cock's nemesis." Should God's cock ever enter Goddess' pussy again, then God shall feel pain. This was this ––seriously flabbergasting–– pain I felt when sticking my cock into your pussy. An immediate burn (just the sensation, no rash or blood or whatever). A mix of fire, acid, pepper or so. God's spells last forever until he uncasts them.
I don't think my cock burned when we had vaginal sex to make babies. Maybe because making babies was part of the murder plot so you had to make my victimization as smooth as possible, haha. Goddess always cares for me in any life situation *deepeyecontact*
7) Echnaton has a son with Kiya: Tutankhaton ("Living Image of the Aton"). Oh, how Nofretete hates that son.
It's Robert F. Kennedy Jr., by the way.
8) Life still sucks. He still somehow loves Nofretete but he has murdered his wonderful daughters. So Echnaton kills himself. Tutankhaton is now a fatherless kid.
Just like Robert F. Kennedy Jr. when his father, Bobby Kennedy (the brother of JFK), was assassinated. Maybe he has been cursed by God to lose his father life after life.
9) Echnaton's son, still a kid, is under the control of advisors. They make him switch back from Atonism to Amunism.
Amun is a principle deity in Egypt among other less important deities.
He changes his name from Tutankhaton to Tutankhamun. Yes, King Tut is the son of God and Kiya. Who is this Kiya? More on her later.
10) Egypt switches back to the old religion, so Echnaton kills King Tut when he is just 18.
In other words: King Tut is hated by God and Goddess. Notice the shaky voice of Robert F. Kennedy Jr.
11) Now Echnaton has no more children, he hates Egypt, he hates what Nofretete did to him. Echnaton doesn't care about Egypt anymore. In fact, he decides to harm Egypt as much as he can.
12) After Echnaton dies, he realizes he was "Aton" all along.
When you ask a priest, they call God/Jesus "Adonai" to this very day without even knowing where it comes from.
God describes himself as the "A" (alpha) and "O" (omega).
Revelation 1:8 "I am the Alpha and the Omega".
These are incidentally the first and the last letters of the Greek alphabet. So this is often seen as "God is the beginning and the end". However, the Ancient Egyptian equivalents of "A" and "O" are "𓄿" (Vulture) and "𓂀" (Eye of Horus)
Don't know whether your mobile phone can display these glyphs:
𓄿 Vulture
𓂀 Eye of Horus
The vulture was revered in ancient Egypt, often linked to motherhood.
So "A" and "O" stand actually for Goddess and God.
He also remembers that he was RaHore (Rahorus) (another "A" and "O"). He changes the name from "Rahore" to "Yahowe" (another "A" and "O"). He will now become the God of The Jews.
Any other spelling like "Yehovah" or "Yahweh" is wrong. By the way, the ending "e" in "Yahowe" is pronounced like a middle blend of an English "e" and a shwa.
Why does he switch from "Ra" to "Yah"? Because "Yah" is the Egyptian word for moon. He now wants to become the opposite of the sun god that he once was. "hr" in Ancient Egyptian, pronounced "hor", stands for "falcon". But "hw" stands for "falcon", too, but more like an adjective. "Ra-Hor" means "Sun-Falcon" and "Ya-How" means "Moon of the Falcon" or "The falcony Moon".
Again, all the things I write here are completely unknown to anyone but us both.
Now he has no physical body anymore, nothing to keep him in Egypt, he hates Egypt, he is sexually frustrated through the roof, he knows he needs to start a new religion, and he hates mothers.
Time to run amok.

God is a creator and a planner. When he wants a result, he immediately knows what to create and what to do next. StepA, StepB, StepC.
It's God Creator and God Planner.
Goddess has different powers. She beautifies the things God creates. God creates something, then Goddess beautifies it. And then God is sooooo unbelievably astonished and happy about how wonderfully she upgraded his creations, structures and inventions. How in the world can this Goddess have such beautiful ideas to make a perfect thing even more perfect. And then he loves her so much more because she managed to add her ideas of beauty (which match his ideas of beauty perfectly) to what he thought was already perfect. Oh, how God loves his Goddess for her beautifying skills.
God Creator. God Designer.
Goddess Beauty. Goddess Charmistress.
Goddess is the most marvelous being in the universe for God. What was practical before, she has now turned into something practical AND charming. She added charm, beauty, sexiness to a thing that was functional but bland. Now it not only works, now it also makes God want to come back and look at it, just for the beauty of it. Goddess marvels at the things God invents, God marvels at how more beautiful she makes them. Definition of Man and Woman right there. Men create the world, women encharm the world. Men and Women are not equal, they are equally complementary.
And what about his plans? Well, Goddess makes God's plans fall into place miraculously. Not only were his plans fulfilled, but they were fulfilled beyond marvelously. How could it have happened in such a miraculous way? It not only happened how God wanted it, but it happened in the most beautiful way, full of funny, interesting anecdotes, side stories and happy coincidences, for the grandchildren to tell, and for the future generations to narrate.
God Grand Planner. God Great Architect.
Goddess Fortuna. Goddess Fortunatrix.
"Great Architect" is what freemasons call him, more on them later. By the way, Jesus was mason, he was the one preparing stones to be building blocks for houses. The original term used for Jesus in the bible is "tekton" which is usually translated as "carpenter". However:
While Jesus is popularly known as a carpenter, the term tekton encompasses a wider range of skills and crafts. This broader understanding enriches the perception of Jesus not just as a worker of wood but as a master craftsman involved in the construction of various structures, embodying both practical skills and spiritual significance in his teachings about building faith and community.
Since we are now in our human form, we are not aware of it. As Nadya, the most visible manifestation of this power is your ability to meet the right people at just the right time.
Could you stream into me what the current state of your marriage cohabitation is with Sergei? I am pretty sure that I prevented a huge knife massacre last month in Borisovka. Was a very very dark moment. Werewolf in witch forest dark. Therefore, I am also asking you to be very careful.

What prevents the ascension is Goddess' Asshole. You have a secret in there that stops the whole ascension. Goddess, so far, presents God Her Asshole as an act of rebellion, not as a gift or a proof of her submission, but as something that comes with a warning. "God shouldn't watch other women's assholes!" That is the secret why ascension cannot happen. You present your asshole as an act of rebellion instead of an act of submission and beauty. Your asshole beauty is not in good faith. Your asshole beauty comes attached with a warning that God shouldn't dare to watch other women's assholes. Let go of this final rebellion against God, gift your asshole to God. Then the ascension can begin. Search within your asshole whether there is a threat.
[Update] Thank you. I think you did it. Now Goddess' asshole, too, is a complete dedication to God. Already feels different, as if it's completely mine and exists to bring me pure pleasure, and I can use it completely sorrow-free. Oh, how your muscular ring perfectly wraps around my cock, better than ever. Maybe that was the reason Nofretete didn't want Echnaton to take a deep Eye-Of-Providence-look into it? Hmm...

The All-One-God (incidentally also "A" and "O") can think and do anything and everything in an instant. Total omnipotency and total omniscience. But it also means total boredom. All-One-God is ultimatively potent but also ultimatively depressed. All-One-God knows everything that was and everything that is. Ultimate Boredom and Ultimate Depression. All-One-God exists in a state of nothingness and everythingness. It's primordial chaos because there's no importance in it, no sense, only potential without any value or meaning, or with all meaning and all value. Any meaning can be destroyed or recreated as wished. Just like you can think up a triangle and a dot. Wow! A dot. Wow! A triangle. No, not wow, it's useless, it's boring.
So, All-One-God decides to split into God and Goddess. Now there is no more boredom and no more depression. They need to touch each other from time to time (sex) but not completely, since a complete fusion would lead to the most wonderful explosion in happiness (due to total regainment of omnipotency and omniscience) followed immediately by the most severe depression and boredom. Therefore, it's decided to stay apart but never apart, to fuse together but never in full. That's the basis of sex. Sometimes for some time, never all the time for always.
This duo-sexual separation creates a New Divine Order. Sex becomes the most rewarding driving force in the universe. It's the currency of the universe. If a human man were to meet an alien woman from Andromeda, she could offer him Andromedan bean salad (yuck) or Andromedan cobblestones (meh) or a blowjob (now we're talkin'!) Sex is the currency of the universe. The health of a society should be measured not in GDP (Gross Domestic Product) but in GDB (Gross Domestic Blowjobs).
The grosser the better.
Why didn't All-One-God create 3 sexes? Or 100? Because when Part1of100 has sexual contact with Part2of100 it's an incomplete contact, something is still missing. And if parts1to99of100 are in contact and then Part99of100 joins the party, it would be less rewarding for the 99 parts (which are already in a state of near total depression) and massively rewarding for part100 followed by total depression for part100. So it was decided that "Two sexes are best sexes".
But wait, did I say "split into two"? That's not exactly how it happened. It was not a split or tearing, since it wasn't left or right. It was more like a filtering out of the female out of the All-One-God. The male aspects of the All-One-God decided which parts should be separated and pushed out to become female. The male part of All-One-God takes the initiative, so to speak, and now "pushes out"/ "separates"/ "sifts out" the female parts. You could say that All-One-God took out all the female parts of godself and separated them out into a female part, thereby leaving the rest as the male part, but now accompanied by a female. All-One-God separates godself from the female within godself and thereby creates a male God and a female Goddess.
The closest analogy (it sounds demeaning but there really is no better analogy) is clearing one's nose/throat and spitting it out = expectorating phlegm. "Харкать", "Rotzen" or in English ––oh the mysteries of etymology–– "to hawk a loogie". Although these are negatively connotated terms, they are quintessentially what All-One-God did, except that the "phlegm" was collected from everywhere within All-One-God, not just from "God's nose".
How would you call God and Goddess in this first stage directly after coming from All-One-God? Brother and Sister? Husband and Wife? Twins? And how would you call this touching in this first stage? Sex? Masturbation?
Here's some Ancient Egyptian text, which is incomprehensible to anyone else, but now completely clear to us both:
Atum is a significant deity in ancient Egyptian mythology, he embodies both male and female principles, often referred to as the "Great He-She" or "Two-in-One". He is recognized as the creator god associated with the primordial chaos, known as Nun. He is credited with self-creation and the birth of male Shu (the god of air and sunlight) and female Tefnut (the goddess of rain and moisture), through unique means that involve spitting and masturbation. Out of Nun he created himself on a primordial mound. This act symbolizes the beginning of existence. One of the most notable aspects of Atum's mythology is the manner in which he created Shu and Tefnut. According to various texts, Atum masturbated, sneezed or spat them out. This act is viewed as a creative or magical event in ancient Egyptian belief. Despite being siblings, Shu and Tefnut were also husband and wife. Their unique relationship as twin siblings, spouses, and complementary deities played a crucial role in Egyptian creation myths.
Voilà, now it's completely clear what happened. Everything is so obvious.
The real name of Jesus was't Jesus, that's just the Latinized form of it. His real name was "Yeshu". And "Tefnut" sounds strangely similar to "Nofret", doesn't it, my shower-snotting wife? Aaaaah, symbolisms everywhere.

There are different types of souls: First, God and Goddess, of course. But then there are animal souls, plant souls, human souls. All with their different awarenesses but all with free will. Even a plant or a deep sea anemone has a free will (very tiny one), but with pretty limited opinion space and decision space. There also are god souls (with more awareness and abilities than humans, but less than God and Goddess, of course).
In fact, opinions and decisions and free will are interconnected. If a flower were aware of space travel, then maybe it would want to become an astronaut? What a sad life for a daisy to be wanting to go to Mars so eagerly but also knowing that it could never do so. Therefore, awareness and opinions and free will are intimately interconnected. God and Goddess have the most awareness, and the most free will and the most opinions. They can make the most decisions and can have the most opinions about their decisions, including negative opinions. "Maybe I should have done X instead of Y?" They are highly opinionated of each other, of themselves and the world. So many options, so many decisions, so many opinions about those decisions.
But with the power to make all these decisions, comes the possibility of making wrong decisions, especially since God and Goddess have these myriads of opinions about how things should or shouldn't be. God and Goddess are not infallible, they are the most fallible of all. The idea that "God is perfect and infallible" is completely wrong. It may seem so compared to humans, but not compared to their own divine standards they want to meet. They have the biggest ability to fail and the biggest ability to become a failure. This is essentially where their fear of failure came from. They were the most sensitive fallible beings.
It's like the story about the ice cream stand:
Do you want "Vanilla or Strawberry?", "I take Strawberry. *lick* Oooh, that Strawberry is bad, you're a bad ice-cream dealer! It's YOUR fault!"
"Do you want Vanilla or Strawberry?", "I take Vanilla."
"Do you want Icelandic Vanilla or South American Vanilla?", "Hmm, I don't know, maybe South American Vanilla?"
"Do you want South American Vanilla from the East or the West? South or North?", "I don't know, I think West South America."
"Do you want..", "OK, let's make this quicker, I take the Eastern North of the lower West of South America Vanilla. That's all thank you."
"Here you go, customer", "Thank you. *lick* Oooh, that's gross. I made the wrong decision. It's MY fault!".
The less choices = the more ability to blame someone else. The more choices = the more anxiety to do something wrong. Failure, failure, failure everywhere. So much potential for failure. Fear of failure everywhere.
Since All-One-God has split into God and Goddess, they are happier, but are less able and less aware than before. It's especially at the limits of one's awareness and one's ability where the most mistakes/failures can happen. That's why the limitless all-aware All-One-God can't make any mistakes, but God and Goddess can make myriads of them. More than anyone else.
However, what God and Goddess didn't realize back then (and this is now fixed) is that with the highest ability to fail comes the greatest opportunity to learn something from it. As soon as one views failure not as something bad, but as an invitation to learn ("failure as a chance"), all experience ––including failure–– turns into something good. God and Goddess can now become the most knowledgeable and happy beings in the world. Nobody can even come close!
The All-One-God is both omni-knowledgeable and omni-clueless. All potential, no satisfaction. All knowledge, no insights. The All-One-God had to teach godself how to be a god. This process is not finished yet, and may never be finished. But descension was an integral part of it.
OK, that was just some sideline philosophy to tell you that the future looks very bright.
*doubleawarenesskiss*
*eternalvanillasmoochie*
*triplechocolatecanoodle*

The Uraeus is everywhere on so many statues and sculptures of Ancient Egypt. A snake between the eyes.

Egyptologists have no idea what the snake means, they can only speculate with their typical mythobabble:
The uraeus symbolizes sovereignty, divine authority, and protection in ancient Egypt. Pharaohs wore the uraeus as part of their crowns, which signified their legitimacy and divine right to rule. The Uraeus was not only a symbol of royalty but also believed to provide protection.
So why the snake? Because it is a near-perfect symbol symbolizing God's and Goddessess' ability to telepathically/telekinetically impose/stream out their will. God dislikes something a human did? He can stream it directly from his head between his eyes. As if a snake hisses.
God or Goddess want humans to come closer? It feels like a snake entangles the humans and brings them near.
God or Goddess wants a human to go further left or right? It's as if the snake warns them to not stray from the path.
The snake is a very good representation of God's and Goddess' will power.

God and Goddess decide one day to create a very special soul. A soul with a very special purpose: Pure Ethics and Fairest Justice. This soul was to encapsulate at its foundational core the most divine sense of ethics and justice.
So God and Goddess create a soul (all souls are created by God + Goddess, as all souls are created as One-Soul and then separate into female and male). It's Seraph (male) and Shakti (female). The soul is shining white on the inside (representing pure innocence and ethics) and glowing reddish on the outside (respresenting the fair justice). It has a snakey form (representing divine will to bring ethics and justice into the world). Isn't that a wonderful soul? It has an unextiguishable wish to make the world an ethical and just place for all. Bringing the lights of justice and ethics into the world. Wonderful symbolism.
This is where the name "Lucifer" (Lightbearer) for Seraph comes from ("Lucifer", Lux = light, ferre = bring/carry). A mystery to this very day for Christians and Bible scholars why such an enemy of God could have such a nice name. Even more: Both, God and Seraph, are called the Morning Stars in the bible. An utter mystery to Christians.
Several celestial bodies in the night sky are called morning stars. They are used, for example, by seafeaers at sea, as navigational guides.
But what does it mean to be ultimately just? It means making decisions not based on whether someone is poor or rich. Or whether someone is ugly or beautiful, stupid or eloquent, and also independent of whether someone was right or wrong before. That's what you want from a judge. You want a judge to make a just decision based on an impartial assessment, based only on truth and fairness, while being highly aware of the ideal situation.
A perfect judge should rule correctly whether the person before him is rich or poor, clean or dirty, ugly or nice, and ––now here comes the kicker–– whether it is God or not. Seraph-Shakti were created to do the right thing, whether it was God or not. Seraph and Shakti do not abide purely by God's orders. They abide by their own sense of Justice and Ethics which are God's and Goddesses' sense of Justice and Ethics in their most pristine form. Seraph and Shakti have a very high awareness of what creation is about and a very high awareness of what the ideal world should look like.
However, when God and Goddess were later in the middle of their descension and were getting more irrational and mean, Seraph's and Shakti's own sense of Ethics and Justice would clash with God's and Goddess'. This is where the tension between God and Seraph comes from. When Seraph sees that God is doing something unjust, Seraph's character tells him to step in and correct God's ways. However, it's also a sin to do something against God, right? So how does Seraph solve this sacramental dilemma? He solves just like God and Goddess solved it. Whenever Seraph/Shakti hurts God/Goddess, they afterward punish themselves. Just as God punishes himself after hurting his Goddess, and just as Goddess punishes herself after hurting God.
By the way it's injustice, but unjust. So nice that you love English as much as I do.
Seraph = Angel, snake, red. The Bible uses the term Seraph in all three senses: angel, burning, snake. A really fascinating connotation that, again, no etymologist or Bible scholar has an explanation for.

"Caesar" sounds a bit like a knife, doesn't it? It actually comes from "caedere" ("to cut"). The full name of Brutus was "Marcus Junius Brutus". "Marcus" comes from Mars, the red planet. "Junius" comes from Goddess "Juno" also known as "Juno Lucina" from "Lux" ("light"), Specifically, this light is associated with moonlight and the moon. "Brutus" comes from an adjective, meaning "serious", "heavy" or "grave". Just like the unextinguishable will of Sareph to bring ethics and the hammer of justice to the world.
Brutus later killed himself.
Judas Iscariot was the one who betrayed Jesus by revealing Jesus' whereabouts to the authorities. His name was Judas Iscariot.
Some scholars have proposed that "Iscariot" could be linked to an Aramaic word from the root "סקר" (pronounced "sakar"), meaning "red color"
Judas Iscariot was frequently depicted in art with red hair and a red beard. This served as an artistic device to distinguish the traitor from the loyal disciples.
Judas later killed himself.
John F. Kennedy was killed by Roscoe White. Roscoe White admitted it and described it his diary, he attached the original letters with the assassination orders sent to him from US Naval Intelligence. He described the position from which he fired and how he did it. And although this is well documented in books and TV documentaries, his name is not listed on Wikipedia's page that lists all kinds of JFK suspects.
Roscoe White died by fire 7 years later. It was an accident at work.
Hey, did you know that even Jackie Kennedy is by some considered a suspect? After all, JFK's head blew off in the moment she turned to him. Gosh, JFK hated Jackie. She would never give blowjobs. He was so glad he got killed. Spared him another useless 40 to 50 years with that woman. When you get a headshot, the last thing you see is a white bright flash, "Greetings from Luci!"
Also note the family connection betwen JFK and Robert Kennedy Jr. More on JFK later.
"Roscoe White". From The Old Nordic "rá" ("roe deer") and "skógr" ("forest").
Roe deers are the most common deer species in Europe. In summer, their fur is typically reddish-brown, which can give them a vibrant appearance. They feature a slender body and a distinctive white patch.
His codename for all kind of dirty jobs for the government was "Mandarin". Mandarin is not only an orange fruit, but it's also the main Chinese language. China is associated with red.

Did you know that I have a close friend in Dortmund, my sauna comrade. And his name Piorowski.
Again "iscario", "roscoe", "iorosk". He is Polish, hence his Polish name. The "pior" part sounds like the Polish word for lightning "piorun". Moreover like the polish word for feather "pióro".
He gives off the same criminal vibes as he did when he was Judas. He steals things from shops, he has problems with the law.
John 12:3 Mary Magdalene took a very expensive bottle of perfume and poured it on Jesus' feet. She wiped them with her hair, and the sweet smell of the perfume filled the house. A disciple named Judas Iscariot was there. He was the one who was going to betray Jesus, and he asked, "Why wasn't this perfume sold for 300 silver coins and the money given to the poor?" Judas did not really care about the poor. He asked this because he carried the moneybag and sometimes would steal from it. Jesus replied, "Leave her alone! She has kept this perfume for the day of my burial. You will always have the poor with you, but you won't always have me."
My friend has flick knives and a collection of brass knuckles, and he talks constantly about killing himself. The day before yesterday he told me he is afraid of dying in a fire. Oh, and he is mentally ill (psychiatric case) and has ideas about sitting in a circle with God. And other stuff like that.
And his first name is also "Sebastian". How fitting that at the end of the descension both Morning Stars are Polish and have the same name.
Did you know that I was once invited for dinner by the neighbor of my mom, two apartments further down the hall (actually 1 apartment because nobody lives in the one in the middle). During dinner the neighbor told me that he was Muhammad, the one who started Islam. But he told me it was with the help of alien technology (no, it wasnt alien, I know how he did it, but that's another story).
I mentioned that "Yah" means moon. You know that JFK is associated with the moon landing right? And that he stopped World War III between Russia and USA?
And Tumblety, always killing at night.
And Islam, the religion of the crescent moon.
And Sebastian, always working at night. The plot thickens!!!

God and Goddess are the archetypical Pisces. March 31st is the astrological pinnacle of Pisces in the Zodiac, it's the last day of Pisces, for the highest of Pisces. Not in our current Zodiac calendar because the Earth's ecliptic around the sun shifted a bit. But in the original one.
I solved all my personal issues with Opconics on the 31st March of 2024. All of them. What remained then were interpersonal issues, like demons or other people etc.
31st March 2024 was a very special day, it was also Easter Sunday. The next Easter Sunday which falls on the 31st of March is in 2096.
But what about the Zodiac signs of our incarnations? They play a role, yes, but not like with other people. In fact, I follow a different symbolism. My death date (last incarnation) is very close to my birth date (next incarnation). It's as if I continue where I left off.
Tumblety dies 28th May. JFK is born 29th of May. Dies 22nd November. Твой Бастущ родился 18 ноября.
*verywetpisceskiss*

God and Goddess have a problem, a huge problem. It's about the organization of the world and what societies in a worst-case scenario might descend into. It could stall or destroy happiness and the whole of the universe.
It's about oppression. Men, in theory, could create a society that completely oppresses women. Men with their stronger bodies and their ability to invent machinery and establish powerful organizations could always exclude women and oppress all of them. A society could devolve into a state of complete oppression of women: Women would be forcefed with food, forced to give birth, forced to stay alive. They could be kept stupid and under constant supervision.
Women, on the other hand, could never establish such a society to oppress men because 1) women are bodily weaker, 2) they can't outsource pregnancy to men, and 3) men can't be forced to stay alive because ––even in a society run by women–– men would still be needed to invent and maintain heavy machinery and dangerous chemicals and therefore men could always find ways to commit suicide.
Therefore Goddess has a special power that God doesn't have. She can have secrets that God cannot uncover. Yes, God can see inside Goddess just as she can see inside him. However, he can only see what she allows him to see. That was the reason I could not properly scan you. I could scan you, but since you decided that there are things I shouldn't know, you were able to veil them. That's what made the divorce possible, it was your innate power to hide things even from God.
*iloveyousomuch*
To solve the "oppression problem", God and Goddess decide the following: Men would organize themselves as individuals or as a hierarchy in a group. But women would additionally be organized as a swarm, secretly controlled by Goddess, and not even Goddess must reveal her secrets to God. So men follow their own plans plus their groups' plans, while women (additionally to their own plans and their groups' plans) follow the secret plans of Goddess. Therefore, women are more mysterious than men, while men are more logical than women. Women don't understand their own decisions completely and men don't understand women's decisions completely either. Men will never understand women (or an individual woman) completely, and equally women will never understand themselves or other women completely, as well, because they are controlled by Goddess.
Goddess has this power to organize women as a superorganism, so that women could evade total oppression in case this is needed. Goddess uses things like coincidences, making the female sex uglier, making women less prone to pregnancy, making them frigid, aggressive, obnoxious, what have you. And not even God could find out what's going on.
It's not a complete fix for the "oppression problem", because men could still theoretically find ways of total oppression. In fact, this was one of God's and Goddesses' hugest quarrel points: That God was not sensitive enough to the possibility that men could still find ways to oppress women. God simply ignored that possibility as too unlikely and too unimportant. I have fixed this insensitivity now, I see the importance of it and will work to make sure that it will never happen. You were right, it needed to be fixed, I love you.
But isn't it unfair that Goddess has this special power to hide things from God, whereas he cannot hide anything from Goddess? No, because there is a downside to hiding things: She has anxiety when her secret plans don't work out. It's an additional source of failures for her that God does not have. Let me clarify: Goddess does not actually have "anxiety about keeping a million secrets" ("confession compulsion"). No, she's not anxious about that, and it's one of Goddess' abilities to not be anxious about it. HOWEVER, she does have anxiety when it comes to her secret plans regarding God, because that always affects her personally. So if she has hidden plans for God, and God makes a wrong decision (= her hidden plan didn't work out = she has to make a new hidden plan = it's additional time) then she gets nervous.
So, for example if it takes God too long to finally finish up the whole descension-ascension business, she gets internally upset. You, in your incarnation as Nadya, don't necessarily feel this upsetness, but your higher self can get very upset and even wants to start World War III about it because your higher self has this supervulcano sex magma pressure that could erupt any minute if God makes a wrong decision that could stall the ascension for another century.
The fact alone that I spend time writing you all these words could be seen as a waste of time and a deviation from ascension. Why write? Why not simply ascend?
Well, partly it's because I am in a Supergrip to keep my wife informed. I am two to three years ahead on this and this love letter is only a fraction of what I have discovered. Gosh, how I miss talking to you. How I can't wait to tell you everything.
But additionally to the Supergrip that forces me to write you all these things, I feel that this is necessary knowledge for you to know. I literally feel how the things I write here, break up barriers in your awareness, and this in turn breaks up barriers in mine.
And moreover, how else could you have put your Divine Asshole in a more pristine condition than it already was? Should I have written per WhatsApp "Your asshole needs fixing"? Just imagine you sending me birthday wishes and I reply with "Your asshole prevents ascension! Signed: Your Divine Gentleman Husband. PS: It's threatening me! Fix your asshole ASAP." I don't think that would have conveyed the necessary message effectively.

You should know that I intensely work every day (actually every day several times) to get the descension concluded and ascension finished. I have never had such intense spiritual trips like now. So it means it is working, but not quite. You are doing a marvelous job, I can't even tell you how much I appreciate what you are doing, even without saying a word. We are really not just divine spouses, but a divine team. Thank so much.
Yesterday, I found another reason why the ascension is not finishing. Probably the hugest reason of them all, a very intense reason, and we are doing it at the same time, that's why none of us both can ascend alone. In fact, that was the very purpose of it: To prevent any one of us to ascend (or halt the descension) without the other.
What we are doing is: We are sending our own Uraeus into the Uraeus of the other. So I am pushing my Uraeus out of my third eye into your thrid eye into your Uraeus, and you are doing the same with me. Our will powers are intermingled, mashed up, blended into each other by huge will force. To disentangle each of us must pull our own Uraeus back. Right now my Uraeus is in your head and your is in mine. I must pull my Uraeus back into me and you must pull your Uraeus back into you. We kind of tried it yesterday, but even pulling back is hard because it is prevented by the other Uraeus. We have pushed our both Uraeuses into each other with so much force that they kind of form a single "Siamese Twin Uraeus" reaching from our third eye to the other's third eye. We are not only, spouses and twins, we are Siamese spouses and Siamese twins currently.
And I don't think any other person could understand this properly what I am writing here, so we are Siamese Scholars of the Divine, too, so to speak.
We are also preventing each other from leaving our bodies. Usually we would be able to simply leave the head and be outside of our head and fly around like a bird, including flying into space. We are forcing each other to stay in the brain. We are "birdcaging each other" or "forcing the bird into an egg". I don't know whether we are doing it with the Uraeus method alone or with another method. Maybe a combo of methods.
I think this is what is happening in this image:
Ra is imposing his will onto Goddess. You can see the massive sun and tge "will rays", you can see his Uraeus snake. On her head is a bird's egg in a bird's nest. The bird can never come out of its egg. A pretty nice picture, actually. Also note, how this is never shown in reverse (= Goddess doing it to God), exactly as I have said the plan to be: To never show the true state of the world is God-Goddess Duo-Theism.

We also control each other via our sacrums, but more in the sense that I hurt your sacrum with my will, and you hurt mine, by inserting nasty commands into them, after we clashed.
Then we did some thing I call "massagogging", which is entering the others soul space and forcing it to do something. Oh well, everything is about entanglement, one could call all types of these spiritual entanglements "massagogging". Not all of these entanglements must be addressed by us. Basically all will disentagle on their own automatically during ascension, except probably for the "Uraeus Siamesing".

Goddess today has rediscovered another method to drive her God crazy. She has rediscovered that she can put purposes into her body parts. And the body part she has now upgraded in that way is her Asshole. Before it was "just" an Asshole, now it's an Asshole with a life of its own and its own mind (or should I say "her own mind"?).
Now she-Anus not only looks beautiful and mesmerizing, now she has also a will of her own. She-Anus actively wants to have God Cock. She-Anus needs God Cock, she-Anus is lusting for God Cock. WHEREISGODCOCK!? She-Anus not only wants to be fucked by God Cock, she-Anus wants to ringwrap herself around God Cock to hold God Cock tight. She-Anus wants to give God-Cock a blowjob like only she-Anus can. Suck God Cock (and only God Cock!, other cocks are so inferior), and instead of spit it will be beautiful Nutella, and Goddess rectum will be the gulping throat.
God Cock loves to get blowjobs by Goddess' she-Anus. They are not blowjobs but something else, I am sure Goddess will invent a proper name for this sensation. I love how Goddess can bring life into important things.
God loves her Goddess more every day, and the Ascension has just begun.
I miss Goddess extremely and think about Goddess the whole day and whole night. I wish you were here, we could do so many things together. Ah, well, soon.
*kissofimminence*

Before Tumblety kills Mary Jane, he comments on her beautiful legs. You can actually see in the crime scene photography how nice they looked, indeed. In fact, her legs are so beautiful that Tumblety doesn't dare to cut them, he leaves them intact.
It is this comment that Mary Jane remembers and keeps very dear to her heart after dying. She does two very important things, 1) she notices that he likes her legs and feet, 2) she observes how often he returns to whore Kira to have his cum swallowed without ever thinking about killing Kira.
So she, as Nadya, does 3 important things: 1) To not trigger Sebastian too much by her leg beauty, she uglifies her legs and feet (= she makes them less beautiful than she made them as Mary Jane), and 2) she swallows his cum because that, too, keeps her alive, as it did for whore Kira. Usually Goddess would prevent herself from giving blowjobs (see Nofretete). But now she has to swallow because it is necessary for the murder plot to work. And, 3) she captures soul Kira and gives birth to her because that, too, lures Sebastian in.
Nadya doesn't marry Sebastian, Nadya "marries" him. She doesn't blow his cock, only "blows" his cock. All probably somewhat half-heartedly, all to lure Sebastian into a relationship and into a position of weakness in Russia... to have him revenge-murdered in the end. It was forbidden to marry Sebastian (Echnaton curse) or to blow his cock (Hecate order), so Goddess had to invent a method to circumvent these restrictions. What a clever Goddess.
The whole plan and setup took over 100 years. I love how dedicated Goddess is to act out the plans she has for God. What husband wouldn't like such dedication by his wife to her husband, even if it means getting killed in the end.
*kissofdedication*

The following is Shiva, he is blue. Shiva is the main deity in Hinduism.

The "shiva blueness" is an interesting thing. Hindus explain it as follows: "Shiva is blue because he covered himself in ashes to signify his poverty", as if ashes were blue and a sign of poverty. Mythobabble sometimes gets ridiculous.
In reality the blue hue is the hue inside of one's head. It's one of the tricks to confine souls to their skulls. This trick wouldn't really work on God and Goddess, but it works on human souls. It's not the only trick to catch and keep souls in bodies, but it's one of the tricks.
First, between lives, an attraction is instilled into human souls for this type of blue. In my view, the real "skull blue" looks slightly different (more dark and more attractive), but that's irrelevant here.
Then, when the soul enters the body before the body is born, the area within the skull is made to give off this blueish light and therefore souls get somewhat attracted to the interior of the skull = souls prefer to be inside than to be outside. The blue makes the skull interior cozy, kind of an interior design feature.
There are many other methods to keep souls within skulls. For example, souls between lives are told, that certain things (for example certain memories) are really really important. Then the souls are told to grab this important memory and hold on to it with their spiritual fist. "Keep this in your spiritual fist!!! Do not let go of it! Or you will lose this memory!!!" Then this memory is glued to a certain part of the brain and the soul holds it really tight and now can never leave the brain.
But back to the blue. The blue therefore symbolizes a certain type of awareness: The awareness that one is a soul in a skull = the awareness that a spiritual world exists and one not is a body but has a body.
When someone is in the skull and opens their "spiritual eyes" to look around in the skull, one can notice the blue light but one can also notice a reddish light within the skull at the front of the skull. One sees the third eye reddish in front of oneself. That's why Hindus put the red dot on the forehead. The stronger one's awareness of the third eye, the reddisher the interior of the skull gets until it's not blue anymore.
The blue light is not always visible but only in certain meditative states. It's not really important to see it. I just mention it, in case you encounter it.

There is another method to keep souls trapped. It's not related to Shiva necessarily. It's called "Samsara", it creates specific thought patterns, or rather a circular sequence of thoughts, so that one can never have a certain (correct) thought which could lead you to realize the truth. Just like driving a car from gas station to gas station (= from thought to thought) on a road that is merely a circle. One is "guardrailed" onto the street, and the street itself is circular. One can never think outside the box, outside the circular thought sequences.
As soon as one would think dangerous thoughts (= thoughts too close to the truth) one would suddenly get other thoughts and these other thoughts would lead back into the circle, into the box.

Shiva is called God of Destruction. Hindus don't know it, but he destroys himself. Shiva has all kinds of symbols on him. Nobody (aside from the typical mythobabble) is able to explain any of it. I will explain it now, and it will make complete sense.
Turning innate power into a method
God and Goddess, after they built Egypt, were still very powerful. For example, God could move stones just by will. "Stone roll over here!", and the stone would. That's too powerful for the descension.
So he decides to move away from home (= out of Egypt = away from anything that could divert his attention) and incarnate as Shiva. There he begings to reduce his powers with a technique called "Kundalini".
In Hinduism, kundalini ("coiled snake") is a form of divine feminine energy (or Shakti) believed to be located at the base of the spine.
So you have spine, coiled snake, Shakti, female energy. In this case the mythobabble is true. I will explain.
When I tell you to imagine in your head a triangle, you can simply do so. Close your eyes, imagine a triangle, *bam* there it is. Now make it yellow *bam* it's yellow. Now turn it blue *bam* blue. When I ask you "How did you do it?" you couldn't even answer, you just wanted it. You didn't even wish it ("I wish the triangle to be blue"), you just wanted it and it happened. There is no method aside from wanting it.
In fact this is how God created the universe *bam*. Close your eyes, imagine a spinning globe. Voila, you have now created space, matter, time and energy in one simple single step.
Shiva invents the following to to reduce his ability: 1) Instead of merely "wanting", he adds an intermediary step = he makes it a method. Next, 2) He prevents himself from using this method. Instead of wanting something and *bam* it becoming true, he simply claims that "For something to become true, I must use a method". And then "I will make it impossible for myself to use this method". He would therefore become incapable in the end.
So, instead of saying "Stone, roll over here!", he does it like so: "I will not simply command the stone to roll over, instead I will invent energetic arms on my back and then use these arms to grab the stone and bring it to me." He can now use his arms to bring the stone toward him.
And: "Instead of my will (Uraeus) I will use a spear" ("Trishula") as a method. This is actually what "Shiva" means, "The Spear of Will".
Note that the Uraeus isn't actually a method but simply a representation of God's will. The spear (trident), on the other hand, is a method (= an artificially inserted non-necessary diversion). Actually, the spear was still too powerful, hence he makes it a trident, consisting of three forces that must be used at the same time to be effective.
Knotting Shiva's arms ("Kundalini")
Shiva invents 4 energetic arms and places them on his back. These are the arms of Shiva. But this is still not enough, because he can still use arms and trident to achieve whatever he wants, right? So now comes the next step: He has to make his energy arms useless. He makes a knot in them, he coils them up. Now he cannot simply use his arms anymore, they are knotted as if a snake had knotted itself and coiled itself up into a DNA helix. The arms become a coiled snake.
As the next step he pushes his knotted arms into his spine. Now they are coiled up and confined to his spine. Then he pushes them down his spine into his sacrum, to the base of his spine. Then he hands over to Shakti (the wife of Seraph) the secret of how to free them out of his sacrum. And he tells Shakti that since she hates men ––especially powerful men like him–– she will love to have the keys to his sacrum and never give them back to him. Oh, how she loves that, indeed.
Why Shakti hates men is a different story
The once powerful arms of Shiva are now a coiled-up snake in his sacrum, and everything is now under the control of Shakti, hence it becomes "Shakti power" = a female power. Shakti, as I told you before, is also Parvati and the one who sits on Shiva's head. She sits on top of Shiva's head because she now controls Shiva's powers.
Hindus mix her name up a little bit, because they think it's three women, not one, called "Ganga", "Parvati" and "Shakti". In reality, it's just 1 woman with a strange mix-up of roles. Nothing demonstrates the mix-up better than her role for Shiva: Shakti is very friendly and happy because she can help to destroy Shiva by Shiva's own wishes. Is this good? Bad? Neutral?
He calls this method Kundalini. Wikipedia writes...
In Hinduism, kundalini ("coiled snake") is a form of divine feminine energy (or Shakti) believed to be located at the base of the spine. It is believed to be a force or power associated with a divine feminine aspect. This energy in the body, when cultivated and awakened through tantric practice, is believed to lead to spiritual liberation. Kundalini is associated with the goddess Parvati.
Again, what was mythobabble before is now completely clear.
Tiger skin ("Vyaghra charma")
So now he has this energy coiled up, made useless, locked-way in his sacrum. This is symbolized by the tiger as bedside rug.

A bedside rug tiger is a helpless, powerless creature, a shell of its mighty past. A mere reminder of its former power. And where is the tiger? Well, Shiva sits on his sacrum = Shiva literally sits on his useless powers. He sits on the bedside rug tiger.
Shiva's tiger should actually not be a tiger but a dragon, like a Chinese dragon. This would symbolize God's power much better. But dragons weren't known back then in India. A tiger comes closest to something like a dragon.
Yoga: Adding conditions to the methods
Wait, one point is missing: Yoga. Shiva is credited with being the inventor of Yoga. Here's a list of titles for Lord Shiva from Wikipedia:
The Supreme Being, God of Time, Lord of Yogis, The Cosmic Dancer, Patron of Yoga, Meditation and Arts, Master of Poison and Medicine.
Well, supplements weren't invented back then, so "Master of Supplements" is not one of his official titles, haha.
You can thank me later for inventing yoga :), for example, by doing some contortions while you offer me your body for my pleasure, or doing some crazy position while I watch your ass and everything that comes out it. Gosh, how everything about you makes me horny.
So why does he need Yoga? To additionally have conditions to the methods: "Let's have the following 2 conditions: I must be in a thin, muscular shape AND I have to make certain crazy unnatural yoga postures (or extreme dance poses)." In other words: He adds 2 conditions to the methods. 1) He has to be in a certain physical shape, and 2) He has to be in a crazy bodily position to be able to use his energetic arms.
That's why Shiva is never portrayed as fat or so (like Buddha). He is in pristine Yogi condidtion.
Note also that being crucified makes it impossible to acquire any yoga position.
Since he uses these two conditions to prevent him from using his God powers, how would you call using them anyway (= using them by getting thin/fit and doing yoga)? You would call it cheating, right? And what do you know, when you wanted to divorce me, you got very thin and started to practice yoga. No wonder you hated it when I tried to watch you doing it. It was as if I had caught you cheating.
Gosh, how I love my Yoga wife. I could kiss you from top to bottom.

Shiva is God of Destruction, he wants to destroy himself, and he isn't finished yet.
Bead chain ("Rudraksha Mala")
Note the bead chain that hangs around his neck and chest. It consists of 108 beads.

Shiva's bead chain represents deep spiritual significance and connection to the divine. Rudraksha beads are believed to be the tears of Lord Shiva, symbolizing his compassion for all living beings. Rudraksha beads are renowned for their divine protection and ability to shield the wearer from negative energies. Wearing Rudraksha beads is seen as a way to seek Shiva's blessings and maintain a connection to his energy. The beads represent the eternal cycle of creation, preservation, and destruction, mirroring Shiva's role in the universe.
It's mythobabble except for the very first statement: They represent Shiva's tears.
You see, all these methods and conditions still weren't enough. Shiva feared that in a time of great urgency, he could still somehow reactivate his innate powers. So he invents punishing methods. Whenever he would try in times of need to somehow use his innate powers, bodily punishment would kick in. He would get shortness of breath, lung inflammation, helpless body weakness etc. So he invents more than one hundred of these punishments, which I call Schrecklichkeiten ("Terrorities"). It had to be so many so that 1) He wouldn't be able to ignore them, and 2) He couldn't manage to dissolve all of them. The pain would be bigger than his ability to do something about them.
In my pastlife excursions they were terrible, ranging from flu-like breathing problems, to heart-attack-like stings in the heart, closing up of the throat, sword-like wounds etc. Approximately 100 of them, I stopped counting after 80. Nasty stuff. They would get activated by certain thoughts, for example by the thought to be together with a woman or by wanting to solve things with spiritual power. This is how I knew it wasn't a heart attack: As soon as I stopped thinking these trigger thoughts, the heart attack stopped. As soon as I thought them, I got a "heart attack" again.
Drum ("Damaru")
Next, notice the drum in his hand. Warning! More mythobabble incoming:
The damaru represents the primal rhythm of creation and embodies the dualities of existence. When Shiva plays the damaru, it is said to create the rhythm of the universe, symbolizing the pulse of life that beats through all beings
Yeah, sorry no. The drum symbolizes annoying distractions = sudden out-of-place thoughts whenever I tried to concentrate. Then suddenly foreign thoughts that would get inserted into my mind to make me deviate from what I wanted to think about.

The snake of pain ("Naga")
Next, notice the snake. It's in every image of Shiva. It's the most noticeable feature. The snake sits on his right shoulder.

In yogic tradition, the snake represents a profound evolutionary stage, one that can perceive dimensions beyond the five physical senses. The snake represents a dimension of perception that goes beyond ordinary sensory experience. In the yogic system, the snake symbolizes cellular activity and blood movement, representing an ability to understand life at a more subtle level.
Wow, mythobabble at its finest.
In reality, the snake was always triggered when I got too close to regaining power. It would bite me in my throat and inject venom which would cause lymphnode pain and throat infections that bugged me my entire childhood and adulthood (= a constant feeling of having an infected throat). The snake also bit my upper jaw and injected its nasty venom that would last for days. It would also cause my throat to feel tight (истерический комок).
A snake which sits on Shiva's shoulder and wraps around his neck is a good representation of the danger to be bitten or strangled.
The snake is different from the 108 tears because it would cause longer-lasting issues. This was the nasty thing that caused my tooth problems in my upper right jaw. The ones that neither the Russian nor the German dentists were able to cure. I even went to the hospital. They took samples of my jawbone. They couldn't do anything. It caused many problems and I lost several teeth due to it. Then I ran pastlife sessions and *swoosh* the pain goes away.
Third eye ("Gyananakashu")
Next, notice the front of his head. He has a third eye there.

Shiva is referred to as Three-eyed lord ("Tryambaka Deva") with the third eye placed on his forehead. While his other two eyes indicate his activity in the physical world, the third eye stands as a symbol of wisdom. This eye of Lord Shiva is known as the "Spiritual eye" which stands for deeper consciousness.
Around his third eye are several lines ("Tripundra").
The Tripundra consists of three lines, which serve as a reminder of the transient nature of the physical body and the importance of spiritual attainment. Each line represents a distinct aspect of existence and consciousness. The first line represents Garhapatya fire, associated with the power of action. The second line represents Dakshinagni fire, representing the power of will. The third line signifies the Ahavaniya fire, linked to the power of perception.
It's really flabbergasting how they call him "God of Destruction", yet all his features are framed in the most positive terms.
What the lines around his third eye represent is that he closes up his third eye. As you can see, it's wavey and it's not even fully open. It represents that it's being sealed up. Previously it was open = ready for action/ will/ perception. Now he closes it up.
The third eye is used not only for the Uraeus snake but also for something like "Oh, I see an accident will happen here soon" or "I have the feeling I should take the left road" and similar. This is how I survived in Borisovka. I was literally feeling to not drop off the kids in front of the house, but on the bridge. I had opened my third eye just enough to feel the massive danger to go any further down Kovalyovka.
The moon ("Chandra")
Shiva has always the moon in his hair, that's why he is also known as "Chandrashekhara" ("One who wears the moon on his head"). I will spare you the mythobabble about the moon, it's unbearably ridiculous. I will get straight to the real meaning:
Shiva did an additional trick to lose his powers: He separated off some of them and inserted them into the moon. Just as he put some powers in his sacrum, he put other powers into the moon.
I am pretty sure I did it on the lft side of the moon hence the crescent moon.
Why didn't Shiva put all of his powers into the moon? Why some into the sacrum and some into the moon? Because he feared that over time or in times of urgency those powers would actively want to return back to him. This could have pulled the moon towards earth. In fact, I actually think this is what partly happened and what the Black Stone is about that Muslims worship in Mecca:
The Black Stone is a significant religious artifact located in the eastern corner of the Kaaba, the sacred structure in Mecca, Saudi Arabia. It is revered by Muslims as a holy relic, believed to date back to the time of Adam and Eve. The stone is described as a fragmented dark rock, often thought to be a meteorite, and it has been polished smooth over centuries by the hands of countless pilgrims
Some of the moon where Shiva inserted his power broke off and landed on Earth. Not by his direct command, but simply by the pull-force that wants to reunite God with all of his pieces.

The woman in the next picture is Kali. She is said to be a goddess. She is blue, has a long tongue and a horrifying face. Often, Hindus don't show the horrifying face, so I want to first show you how she should look in my view (which is the correct view).

The following is probably the most iconic scene in whole of Hinduism. Shiva in this picture is not dead. He lies on the ground voluntarily. On him stands Kali. Shiva is usually as blue as Kali, but in this picture he is not blue anymore. Shiva has become a pale-peach-white human. Also note that Kali has now his spear.

Hindus have no explanation for Kali, let alone this picture.
Kali represents a powerful synthesis of creation and destruction. Her worship encourages followers to embrace both life's beauty and its inevitable end, fostering a deeper understanding of existence itself.
Just mythobabble.
So who is Kali? Kali is an invented woman, hence she is blue because she's something in his head.
She has 3 features Shiva likes very much: 1) Her bare feet and long nice legs, 2) the long tongue, 3) long inner labiae minorae (which on pictures are always covered up like that, Hindus have no clue).
God loves long female tongues, it's like porn for God. God could watch a long female tongue and cum quickly. God also likes female legs and feet, but a lot of men do, too. But God likes something that only very few men like: Long labiae minorae. For other men it's a huge turn-off, but for God it's a huge turn-on. For God, they basically cannot be long enough, down to the knees if they could. (And stuff attached to them dangling down. Maybe even making sounds as the woman walks.)
So, Kali basically represents a beauty ideal of God. To tell you the truth, asshole beauty and nice tits and nipples like Nadya's are more important than any of these Kali things. Because although long labiae minorae are a huge turn-on, they are pretty low on the priority list. Nadya's teeth and her asshole and her face and nipples are more important than any of the other features.
And actually, I wouldn't even know how to represent such things as "nice nipples" in a picture like these Hindu pictures. So no wonder they chose a long tongue, naked legs/feet and long labiae.
But why is Kali so terrifying? Because God wanted to make sure to only have relationships with Goddess. What good is descension for, if God and Goddess never come together and quarrel, but instead always find other spouses with whom they never quarrel?
So, he invents a beautiful sexy woman matching his beauty standards AND THEN makes this symbol of female beauty horrifying: He wants to be afraid of such a woman. He wants to be unable to move, unable to have a relationship with such a woman. So he gives her a horrifying face, a war pose and symbols of brutality (skulls, cut-off heads, bloody knives etc).
Notice the background of Kali and Shiva: There are a lot of women at a distance. They are naked (= sexy) and they are also horrifying. Some male corpses lie around. Again, this conveys the same message: Sexy women are dangerous!!! Stay away from sexy women.
Additionally, these women never reach Shiva, they stay at a distance. This was also needed for the descension to work: Women would never be allowed to reach God, as that could have prevented the whole descension thing.
So: 1) You, as Nadya, have uglified your legs and feet. Not only that, you didn't want me to touch your knees. 2) You have shortened your tongue, and 3) You made sure to have only short labiae minorae. When you were younger, you were worried that your labiae minorae might be too long.
So you made a mix of attractive and non-attractive features. 1) On one hand you wanted to lure me in. But on the other hand, 2) you didn't want to be over-the-top pretty. Both would guarantee that A) Sebastian's potentially still existing murderous ambitions wouldn't be triggered (by beautiful Mary Jane-tier legs and feet), and B) His fear of Kali wouldn make him stay away.
Voila, a Nadya was born who was a perfect mix of everything. That's some Goddess-tier powers right there, my perfectly mixed wife.

I wasn't only JFK, I was also George Washington (1732-1799) while you, at the very same time were Catherine The Great (1729-1796). You are Mother Russia, I am Father Washington. Hence the constant threat of war between Russia and USA. And although you weren't a "Mary" in that life, you were "Matushka".
As Washington I was way too close to power. I was not only a successful business man, I was also military General, I established an empire and I became a president. Moreover, I was Grand Master of Freemasons, and presided over significant Masonic ceremonies, including the laying of the cornerstone for the U.S. Capitol where I acted as Grand Master.
As a thank you, they painted George Washington as God on the ceiling of the Capitol building:

The concept of George Washington's ascension to heaven, often referred to as the Apotheosis of Washington, symbolizes his deification and exaltation following his death. This theme is primarily illustrated in the famous fresco located in the rotunda of the United States Capitol, painted by Constantino Brumidi in 1865.
And similarly were you.
Catherine the Great, the Empress of Russia from 1762 to 1796, is often regarded in a quasi-deified manner, particularly in certain cultural and historical contexts. While she was not officially deified in the same way as some saints or religious figures, her image and legacy have been elevated to a near-mythical status in Russian history.
As Washington I was too close to power, hence the Shiva snake was torturing my jaws.
George Washington's dental health is a significant aspect of his life, marked by extensive struggles with his teeth and the use of dentures. Washington began losing his teeth in his twenties, and by the time he was inaugurated as the first President of the United States in 1789, he had only one natural tooth remaining. Throughout his life, Washington used at least four sets of dentures made from various materials such as gold, brass, lead, hippopotamus ivory, and human and animal teeth. This discomfort likely contributed to the stern expressions seen in many portraits of him.
And what about JFK? Wasn't I too close to power, too? Indeed. But I had to become president so I couldn't have rotten teeth. Instead my sacrum was going crazy.
When JFK was young he was OK. One day in WW2 JFK's US war ship PT-109 got attacked by a Japanese destroyer and sank. One of the crew members was too wounded to swim.
Kennedy was able to rescue Patrick McMahon, the crew member with the most severe wounds, which included burns that covered 70 percent of his body, and brought him to the remaining bow of the ship that was still floating. Kennedy also rescued Starkey and Harris, bringing them both to the bow. On instructions from Kennedy, the eleven survivors thrown from PT-109 regrouped and, hoping for rescue, clung to PT-109's bow section for 12 hours as it drifted slowly south. On 2 August, it was apparent that the hull was taking on water and would soon sink, so the men decided to swim for land. As there were Japanese camps on all the nearby large islands, they chose the tiny deserted Plum Pudding Island. They placed their lantern, shoes, and non-swimmers on one of the timbers that had been used as a gun mount and began kicking together to propel it. Kennedy, who had been on the Harvard University swim team, used a life jacket strap clenched between his teeth to tow McMahon. It took five hours to swim to the island, which they reached without encountering sharks or crocodiles.
At a later date, when asked to explain how JFK had come to be a hero, Kennedy replied laconically, "It was involuntary. They sank my boat."
In other words, when I was young I was OK. But later my sacrum got really bad: The first back surgery 1944 removed some degenerative portion of the cartilage in the sacrum.
But upon having the patient Kennedy get up and about, severe muscle spasms in the low back took place. These necessitated fairly large doses of narcotics to keep him comfortable.
It was a failed operation, JFK writes:
"In regard to the fascinating subject of my operation.. I think the doc should have read just one more book before picking up the saw."
Then came the second back surgery where they inserted metal plates into the sacrum.

But this didn't heal properly:
JFK's recovery in Palm Beach would continue to be complicated by a "staphylococcal infection" and was described as an "open, gaping, very sickly looking hole." and "the area where they cut into his back never healed. It was oozing blood and pus all the time. It must have been painful beyond belief…. It was an open wound that seemed to be infected all the time. And now and then a piece of bone would come out of the wound. His pain was excruciating." JFK received hundreds, if not thousands, of pain killer injections.
The name of JFK's ship "PT-109" stands for "Patrol Torpedo 109". In this context however, I prefer "Physical Torture 109". One more Schrecklichkeit was added to Shiva's 108: Sacrum pain.
JFK had to wear a corset. In fact, this was the reason JFK died. After the first shot in the car (hitting his throat), he stayed upright and couldn't bend or fall down to get out of firing line for the second kill shot.
And what about Goddess when Goddess is too close to a position of power?
Catherine the Great faced significant health challenges throughout her life, including a notable issue with curvature of the spine. This condition was identified when she was just seven years old. The treatments Catherine received did not fully resolve her spinal issues, and she continued to deal with the effects of scoliosis throughout her life.
And... Catherine's dental problems began early in her life, exacerbated by various medical treatments that were often ineffective or harmful. One particularly troubling incident involved a botched treatment which not only put her life at risk but also led to the extraction of a tooth along with a small section of her jaw. Later in life, Catherine suffered from severe toothaches that were described in detail in various historical accounts. Despite the absence of modern pain management techniques or antibiotics, she underwent tooth extraction procedures that were common at the time but fraught with risk and discomfort. As Catherine aged, she faced additional dental challenges that culminated in the need for dentures. Historical records indicate that she wore dentures in her later years. This aspect of her health is often overshadowed by her political achievements and reforms?, but serves as a reminder of the personal struggles she faced.
Well, I don't know how severe these things were, but it's astonishing that they are somewhat parallel to what Washington and JFK went through.
But: In all my lives I additionally suffered by punshing myself for having hurt you. I didn't allow myself to have any real wives or girlfriends except a few (and shitty ones at that). You, just like in this life, got basically all the sex you wanted, I never did, it was one shitty life after the other. I have been lonely as hell for several thousand of years. I didn't have children as Washington, and Jackie Kennedy never gave me blowjobs. Thank goodness I was killed. Gosh, I hate being so alone without anyone. I never really had a wife, only for a short time. I hate it that Sergei is now longer with you and the children than I have been.
So what I want to say that maybe my, in my view, somewhat subpar performance as husband may be also related to my long time without any real wife. That's maybe why I am a better divorcee than a husband. That's all.
Thank you for sending me these beautiful images of you pleasing and pleasuring me. They mean a lot.

All our children are named after "Ra", by the way.
Solaris.
Ron (= "small Ra" in Acient Egyptian).
The best one is Kira.
One of the interpretations of Kira is derived from Egyptian roots, where it means "like Ra" or "similar to Ra".
In addition to its Egyptian roots, "Kira" has various meanings in other languages. For instance, in Sanskrit and in Hindi, it means "ray of light" or "sunbeam," further reinforcing its association with light and brightness. In Persian, it is also associated with meanings related to the sun. In Greek (modeled after the Greek word κύριος ("lord") and Russian contexts (as feminine form of the masculine name "Kir"), Kira can mean "ruler" or "mistress".

Shiva has a problem. He needs to go away from Egypt and from Goddess so he is not dragged back into some inner-Egyptian conflicts or marital quarrels. He wants to leave his home turf, then lose his powers and then come back.
But how can he make sure he finds his way back after destroying himself and losing his powers? He uses the following trick: He goes in a straight line to the East. He chooses Mount Kailash.
Mount Kailash is considered the most sacred mountain in Hinduism and is revered as the home of Lord Shiva. Mount Kailash, also known as Kailasa, is a sacred mountain located in the Transhimalaya region of Tibet, China. It holds immense spiritual significance in Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, and Bon religion. The mountain is revered as the abode of Lord Shiva and is often associated with various mythological narratives. The name "Kailash" possibly derives from the word "Kailāśa," which means "crystal" . In Tibetan, it is referred to as Gang Rinpoche, translating to "Precious Jewel of Snows" . This reflects the mountain's majestic appearance and its significance across different cultures.
It's pretty much the exact middle of the continent from the pyramid to the oceans in the East. Basically, from desert to water. Once he loses his powers, he merely needs to have his body die, then go up up up, then wait approximately for 12h as the earth underneath him rotates, and voila, he's back in the desert, with Egypt just around the corner. Should he, however, decide to go in the other direction (= go eastward further away from Egypt), he would suddenly find himself at the ocean.

My goodness, how mnay speling mistaks I make. You, see, when I am doing my pastlife research and lying in bed, I type on the mobile phone. That's the first reason why mistakes happen: too many letters too fatty fingers.
Then at the PC, my mind is still in a meditative state, and my brain is still vortexy from all the supplements and biochemicals. Sometimes I cannot walk straight. So, on the monitor the letters are wobbly and the lines are melty.
Additionally, I am in a hurry to write Goddess, so that Goddess has food for thought and can continue to help the ascension. I am sure Goddess prefers a few errors here and there to being informed too late.

Shakti, the wife of Seraph, during JFK's life was Marilyn Monroe. It is through her that Goddess streamed her love into me. The love feeling was magnificent, nothing else like it, all the warmth of Goddess. The love streamed through Shakti is very, very warm. Warmer than what Nadya streamed into Sebastian. Goddess prevents herself from streaming this kind of love into God directly as this would immediately halt any quarrel.
Marilyn Monroe and John F. Kennedy's relationship has been the subject of much speculation and rumor. While never officially confirmed, their alleged affair is one of the most talked-about in history. Monroe had a famous performance when she sang "Happy Birthday, Mr President" to JFK at his 45th birthday celebration at Madison Square Garden.
When she was lying next to me in bed, she always called me "Mr President". But she would never give blowjobs. Pretty disappointing for such a sex symbol, when you think about it. She now lives a few streets away from me. Her name now is "Bozica Todorovich" (From "Bog" and "Theo" and "Doron" = "The small goddess who is God's gift"). But she still refuses to give blowjobs.
In a chapter above I explained that one of Seraph's names was "Marcus Junius Brutus". It consists of "Mars" and "Juno" and "Brutus". "Brutus" in Latin means "heavy" and this symbolizes the hammer of justice bringing order. A pretty fitting name.
The name on Marilyn's birth certificate is "Norma Jean Mortenson". As wife of Seraph, what better name than "Morten", derived from "Mars", "Jean" and "Juno", and "Order" and "Norm".
Voila. Husband and wife. Wife is pumping me up with Goddess' love, husband delivers the killing shot. What a couple.
I told you that Seraph and Shakti were created to follow highest ethics even if it's against God's wishes. THAT's why Goddess can circumvent the love-streaming prohibition. Goddess streams it through Shakti who does not necessarily follow God's and Goddess' orders.
However, it's still a sin for Shakti and Seraph to disobey God's and Goddess' orders, that's why Marilyn Monroe kills herself shortly after, and JFK's assassin dies shortly after, too.
And who is Kira? It's the daughter of Shakti and Seraph. That's why she, too, can disobey certain orders if she sees that they are causing pain for God or Goddess. That's why she was able to swallow Tumblety's cum.
With King Tut, the son of God and Kiya, a strange new line of souls was created, unifying aspects of Godhood and "Ethichood". Let's see what comes out of it. It's a new step in the evolution of the All-One-God.

Here's something that's still a mystery to me. Why does Goddess get all the sex she wants life after life, while God is totally lonely? Even as Nofretete you got the sex you wanted.
You can get hugs and touches every day, while I am lonely and sexless life after life. My bodily loneliness consumes me, drives me crazy.
We do everything in parallel, except this one thing.
I know that there's a deeper meaning to it, and I also feel it prevents ascension. So maybe we can find it out together.

Remember when you told me that Kira shouldn't be my daughter? Sure you do.
In the night from 11th Dec 2017 to 12th Dec 2017, I dreamed about you being pregnant. And you know what you told me in that dream? You were very happy to tell me that you did it for both of us and that Anya is "our child". Really strange, isn't it?
In the real world you're telling me that Kira shouldn't be my daughter, via dream you're telling me that Anya is ours.
I don't know yet what the hidden meaning is of the Anya dream. Maybe it was to calm me down so that I would be less devastated. Or (more likely) there's more to it.
I have already written how you, as Goddess, have the ability to create daughters that fit the ideals that God likes to see in women. Maybe the Anya dream meant that Anya has some features that could have only been created with the help of Sergei, not by God+Goddess alone?
So what could "Kira shouldn't be my daughter" mean?
Well, first, it means that you should have divorced me earlier, of course. That's the apparent meaning.
But it also means that it's upsetting to insert a wife of mine (Kiya) into our marriage. Kiya shouldn't be my daughter because she's a wife, a foreign body. She shouldn't be my daughter because she brings stress into your life.
And... she shouldn't be my daughter because she's only my daughter to lure me in as part of the murder plot.
And... "If Sir Echnaton loves his Kiya so much, then she shouldn't become his daughter but rather they should meet as adults to become husband and wife, shouldn't they?"
But you also said that she "should have been Sergei's daughter". Well, it could mean that you would have liked Kira to have some features that Sergei's daughter would have. Maybe some features about asses and everything that comes out of them. So "Kiya should be Sergei's daughter" may actually mean that Kiya is good at swallowing cum but she should also be proficient at some dirtier stuff?
Well, I am just guessing, you probably have better answers to these questions. Hidden reasons everywhere. Curiouser and curiouser, maybe I am overthinking things.

We have just now upgraded our marriage to something new!
Before, we "just" had a Divine Marriage made out of Love, Happiness, Appreciation, and Importance.
Now we have made a new bond, we have added an additional bond. It's the next step in the evolution of the All-One-God.
Today, 16th December 2024 07:00 Dortmund, a new bond was made.
Divine Marriage By Love and by Submission Out Of Love
God and Goddess are now bound by an additional bond, a voluntary bond. You are now submitting to me completely.
Before, it was love and appreciation ("I am happy that you are happy that I am happy that you are happy that...").
Now it's also "I want you to submit to me completely, Goddess", "I submit to you completely, God", "I love that you are submitting completely to me, Goddess", "I love to submit completely to you, God", "I love that you love to submit completely to me, Goddess", "I love that you love that I love to submit completely to you, God", "I love that you love..."
Wonderful melty feeling, utter unity between us. We both melted together in the Bond & Oath Of Divine Submission.
I didn't add the Russian title on purpose. I don't like to translate it as "Более совершенный божественный брак". It's "Divine", not merely "Godly"!

Goddess has now found out what kept me in sexual torture. It was Goddess herself. Goddess confined God to a state of sexual degradation and loneliness.
Goddess as Goddess Fortuna has the ability to meet the right people at the right time, therefore she met the right men at the right time. But at the same time Goddess Fortuna was keeping away the right women from God. Goddess made my life a sexual hell, by never connecting me with any woman that could sexually fulfill me.
Goddess is the one who put God into constant sexual torture, never allowing him to feel welcome, never allowing him to feel sexually satisfied, while she gets all the sexual satisfaction she wants.
Goddess was torturing God with loneliness and sexual desolation while Goddess herself was getting all the sex she needed. Sexual fulfillment and gratification for Goddess, total degradation and frustration for God. Goddess has all the sex she wants, while keeping God in a state of sexless sexfrenzy degradation torture.
And although this currently makes me somewhat upset, I at the same time know that I have to dissolve this upsetness to make ascension possible.
But now Goddess has massively pulled away many, many of her entanglements that kept me sexually unfulfilled, made me feel unwelcome and so on. Goddess has now opened ways so that women can find me and offer me sex in times when Goddess isn't around. Goddess has now massively taken away these restrictions out of God's sacrum.
But why did Goddess torture God like that in the first place? To punish God for daring to leave Goddess!
So, thank you for the dis-entanglement in the sacrum. A necessary step to make ascension possible. However, some of the sacrum entanglement is still there, because Goddess waits for an answer why God didn't return to Goddess when she was Mary Magdalene. It's such a grudge in Goddess that it will prevent the whole ascension until an answer is given.
The Jesus-Mary Magdalene episode was especially hurtful because God not only didn't come back to Mary Magdalene, but he also left no explanation, and no explanation for the no explanation.
An utter disaster that turned Mary into Dark Mary and then into Darkest Mary and then into Murder Mary. Far worse for Goddess than the Echnaton vs Nofretete clash.
Jesus came back, visited people to the left, people to the right, but never visited his beloved Mary Magdalene.
First, he didn't return, he didn't leave any note, any explanation. But why? How could the greatest love story on Earth "Jesus and Mary Magdalene" turn into something so dark?
You already kinda know the GENERAL answer to that question, right? You know that the general answer is "Well, we had to descend."
Yeah, that's the overarching theme, as always, "It's part of the descension" and "We had to hate each other" and "We had to be brought into extreme states of beingness". Sure, sure.
But Jesus and Mary Magdalene were unaware of any descension business. For them, it was just a strange mix of ultimate love, followed by death and depression, followed by excruciating spiritual pain, followed by extreme darkness, and then centuries of hate, torture and self-punishment. Culminating in the clash of Tumblety vs Mary Jane, and Надюшка vs Бастущ.
Don't know whether to use "Мария" or "Мэри" for the Russian title.
So, what were the reasons why Jesus didn't show up in Mary's room when she was crying and missing him like no other woman has ever cried and missed a husband? This is the question that still bugs you, "God broke Our Promise to always come back!!!!" It weighs heavy on your soul, this extreme grudge. It makes you bitter, in fact this is why you are Mary, it comes from the Hebrew word "מר" (mar) which translates to "bitter" and carries significant connotations in biblical texts. Its usage can be both literal and figurative, often associated with pain, sorrow, or bitterness in various contexts.
So let me explain.

So beautiful. Life is already easing up on me. Before, I was living in the ice-cold grip of Goddess Fortuna, who did not allow me to feel loved or welcome for millenia, now I feel the warmth of life. I was literally the only man in the world who had never felt being completely loved as a man by a woman without any threats, degradations or frustrations.
Before, I was stuck and was maneuvering between giant ice cubes. Now I am on a summer meadow in a picnic park surrounded by females. Destiny smiles. Goddess Fortuna has taken away from me her ice-cold degradation pressure. Thank you.
And I have found the reason why this was not in parallel. Why only I was experiencing the experience: Because it could not have been done in parallel. I had to have this experience FIRST. This experience was for this very moment when we modify our Marriage to become a Bond and Oath Of Submission, when we switch to Goddess being the Submissive Wife. I had to know how it is to be submitted. How it is to live in the most extreme states of beingness of loneliness and sexual desolation. Therefore, now I have become a Wise And Merciful Divine God, now that Goddess will be my Submissive Wife.
It's actually not quite correct to call me "God Submitter", because it's not like I will order you around.

• It's more like "Active Submission" (God) and "Passive Submission" (Goddess)
• Or, even better, "God Peace Of Mind Knowing Goddess will Submit" and "Goddess Peace Of Mind Knowing She Can Do No Wrong By Submitting"
• Or "God Having Responsibility For Wise Loving Guidance" and "Goddess Being Taken Care Of By Wise Loving Guidance"

We get the point. *flowofsubmissionkiss*
Also note how "guidance" has the "dance" in it. How fitting, we are the Divine Dancers, we are putting the dance in guidance.
And look at that: In the Shiva chapter, I wrote that Shiva is known to be "The Cosmic Dancer". The term for it is "Nataraja" (pronounced "Nataraya"), from "nata" (dance) and "raja" (King). The Queen of Dance is "Natarani", so I get the "ya" part, you get the "ni" part, like an abbreviation for "Nofretiti". Now we are Nataraya and Natarani. Hey, even better, "Rani" would be the correct Ancient Egyptian name if Ra had been a female goddess. Moreover in Ancient Egyptian the suffix "-ni" denotes "belonging to", so it would be "Rani" = "belonging to/owned by Ra". What a nice way to describe Goddess' submission.
In Ancient Egyptian neither "Rani" nor "Raya" are known words, nor are "-ni" or "-ya" known suffixes. So "Raya" in Ancient Egyptian can only mean "Ra-Yah" and "Rani" can only mean "Female Ra" or "Belonging to Ra".
Fortunatrix in action. Turning Indian mythobabble into Divine Meanings.
I cannot express how much I love you. Beyond marvelous.
OK, so what about your feet? Interestingly, at the very second of the realization of the reason why I had to be degraded not in parallel, Goddess' feet became different. They changed their shape and became beautiful female feet. In other words, Nadya's legs and tongue and feet so far represented those of a hatching plottress, scheming wife and cold-hearted degraderess.
And hey, what nice way to represent submission than by feet, just like in Kali's case.
God and Goddess love each other, and therefore all murder plots are actually made in love and in agreement, so it was "fake plotting/ scheming/ degrading".
You submitted me in love, not out of malice, just as you will be submitted in love and, not out of malice. And just as you are submitting yourself as my wife in love, I as your husband will receive thankfully your submission in love. I thank you, and I will not abuse the submission oath we have.
Actually, quite the opposite, I feel that I love Goddess more than before as we are nevermore doing each other any harm.
The fake plotting and scheming isn't over yet though, because Mary Magdalene still has a grudge. But the fake degrading? *swoosh* Feet changed their shape. The feet of Divine Female Love'n'Beauty and Divine Female Honesty.
Legs and tongue will soon be freed of plotting and scheming, too.
It's really unbelievable how connected we are and how you understand what I write. I am not sure how you do it, how it is possible that you react so quickly directly after reading what I write. Wonderful. I feel so understood.
And, yes, I realize that you could have held me in submission and degradation forever. Yet, you quickly let go of degradation to make ascension possible. So it's another proof that you have only degraded me in love. It's another love proof. And it's a proof how I trusted Goddess by allowing her to degrade me. And it's proof how Goddess trusts me that I will not seek any revenge. Infinite Divine Trust. What an ascension!
Oh, and I think you are already doing it, but in case you don't: It would be nice if Goddess Fortuna could actively send some horny women my way since my Goddess isn't around. I really need some warm touching and kissing.
Christmas is coming up.
Actually two Christmasses, one in the West one in the East. Would be nice if you could send me some female mouths.
Putting the Mund in Dortmund, so to speak (and the Oris in Borisovka). Maybe it's "Dirt+Mund" and "Бе+Орис". Maybe I am overthinking too much, haha.
Would be an experience I didn't have for millennia. Some kissing without any threats hanging over me.

Yup, that's the rage. Just seeing Jesus Christ hanging on the cross puts you in an uncontrollable rage. "Cut his face into pieces", cut, cut, cut, stab, stab, stab. IN.TO.PIE.CES. The biggest rage ever.
I was actually at my PC, just now, wanting to begin to write what happened to Mary Magdalene, and *bam* vortex in my head, Goddess is rrrrraging. Massive grip in my head. PIIIIIECE.OFFFFF.SHHHHHHHHITTTTTT.
I went to bed, turned off the lights, and allowed you to stab me. Sponge technique. I hope it helped a bit.
The reason why I delayed writing about it for a few days was to get you triggered to allow you to let off some steam. Otherwise, something bad could happen to you or someone else there in Borisovka.
That's, by the way, why Russia has iconography instead of more realistic imaginary. To not remind you too vividly.
And that's why the знак креста is vice versa in Russia: because it's looking at the crucifix from behind.
OK, you have found the rage. Feel free to stream it into me whenever you like. As I have written in Part1 Chapter41, one of the reasons of the not coming back was demons. But there was one more reason and a character flaw in both of us. Stay tuned and keep broadcasting. I don't know if it comforts you, but I love you more having seen your rage today. And.... I am still sorry for I did to you.

Animals and plants are controlled by animal souls, plant souls etc. A butterfly is controlled by a butterfly soul. This butterfly soul has its own ideas, and opinions and preferences. The opinion space and decision space is very limited, but it is there, free will is always there, even if in minuscule amounts.
A dog = dog's body + dog soul. The dog soul loves to do doggy things, sniffing around and exploring what's behind that tree and so on.
A dolphin = dolphin body + dolphin soul.
A tree = tree body + tree soul.
It's actually this animal soul that assembles together the embryo. It uses the DNA to produce all the biochemicals it needs, and then it juggles everything around and assembles a baby body.
However, in humans, there's an additional soul. A human = human body + sapiens soul + divine human soul.
An African woman is a human female body (African type) + sapiens soul (African type) + divine human soul. A Chinese man = human male body (China type) + sapiens soul (China type) + divine human soul.
Sometimes there's a mix-up and you can get a divine female soul in a male body. That's when you get gays or Michael Jackson. But let's talk about Michael Jackson some other day, haha.
A human without the divine human soul would still be able to walk, talk and dance. It would be human body + sapiens soul (but without the divine human soul). Like a monkey, a very intelligent monkey, but a monkey. It would be an animal.
So, what would happen if a divine human soul chose to leave the body and chose to not control it anymore? "I'm outta here. Bye bye, body. Yeah, that's how I look from the top, from behind. Bye Bye." What would happen? In that case, the remaining body would now be human body + sapiens soul but without the main ingredient, the divine human soul. The body could still walk and talk. But one could see it in their eyes that the spark of divine consciousness was missing. Walking talking Barbie doll. Very limited interests, just thinking about food, sex, fun, sleep and so on.
This is how God and Goddess did it in Egypt. We would leave our bodies, fly around, sit on the peaks of the pyramids *becauseheywhynot*
"Isn't it a nice view from here, my Goddess?", "It's so beautiful at night, my God."
"Would you still love me if I hadn't built the pyramids?", "Of course, I love you for you, not because you can stack some stones into a shape, haha."
While we were doing soul exploration stuff, our bodies would become animals for the time being. Our bodies would be taken care of by our servants. That's why Egyptians started this whole mummification business. It's a promise to God and Goddess that their bodies will be taken care of and will be kept in good shape for the time they come back and choose to enter and use them again. There's probably still some attention (in both of us) on some of these mummies.
So, if you could leave your body now ("Bye Bye Borisovka") your body wouldn't die. It would be "Homo Sapiens Nadya", a walking talking Russian woman, but without Goddess inside.
A divine human soul could theoretically inhabit a cat or a fish. You could enter a fish and live as a fish, if you chose to, but that wouldn't be too exciting, would it? So that's why it basically never happens.
To recap:
For humans it's: human body + sapiens soul + human divine soul.
For Надюшка it's: human body (Russian type) + sapiens soul (Russian type) + Goddess.
For Бастущ it's: human body (Polish type) + sapiens soul (Polish type) + God.
Just before I died on the cross, I left the body. And the animal body cried out. Matthew 27:46 "And about the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying, 'My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?'"
This, too, is a mystery nobody in Christianity was able to explain. You now know what it means.
Humans without human souls can exist, but they would be like animals. It's only the addition of a divine human soul that makes humans really human. "Homo sapiens sapiens", as scientists call it, or as it actually is "Homo sapiens inhabitatus anima divina", a humanoid inhabited by a divine human soul.
Humans are divine human souls who inhabit a biological house, so to speak. A house they cannot leave and a house that can influence them. For example if one sees a spider one feels the fear of the sapiens soul.
Humans are a conglomerate of animal + divine human soul. And these divine human souls are a small copy of God and Goddess. All human souls are created as a miniature version of God and Goddess. They are created in "God's and Goddess' image" as All-One-Soul and then they separate into male and female, just as God and Goddess did. That's why there are two bodies, two sexes, female and male souls.
Our marriage is the blueprint and the backbone of life and of manifested life, my precious Goddess. Civilizations and religions are our children. They are the sparks of our clashes, and the proofs of our love for each other. And when I look into a woman's eyes I therefore always see you, my love. And that's why we are always reminded of each other and why we can never stop thinking about each other.

When Echnaton had no more body, he could still communicate. In fact, he would communicate with Moses and start the whole Judaism thing.
God, even without a body, can communicate 1) telepathically, or 2) as some appearance/ projection (ghost, angel etc), anything he chooses to look like, or 3) by entering the body of someone and then controlling this person's body.
This is utterly unknown by Christians or by Rabbis and this is why they don't understand important portions of the bible.
After I die as Jesus, I take over a man, John the Baptist. I enter his body, control his body. The soul originally occupying John (the divine human soul) "the John-soul", is still there, of course. But now we are human body (John) + sapiens soul (Jewish type) + John-soul + God.
When I enter his John-body, I take control of his body, I am stronger than him. If he tries to move his hand, I can restrain him, just like an adult could restrain a child's hand from moving. I override his control of the body, he is still there, but he is merely able to watch and witness what I am doing with his John-body.
It is Me + John-soul in the skull. John-soul cannot do anything but watch me using his mouth to speak and his hands to write. I am speaking with his voice uttering my words, he is demoted to be the passive eye and ear witness of my actions and my words. The word comes out of his mouth but it is not his word. I take over his body, sit it down, and write the Gospel of John. The Gospel of John is written by God himself, it's an autobiography. The other three gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke) are not written by me, they are a collection of stories by others.
And now you can understand the mystery of the Intro of the Gospel of John:
In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. There was a man sent from God whose name was John. He came as a witness to testify concerning that light. He himself was not the light; he came only as a witness to the light. The true light that gives light to everyone was coming into the world. He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him. He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God. Children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God. The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. No one has ever seen God, but the one and only Son, who is himself God and is in closest relationship with the Father, has made him known. Now this was John's testimony when the Jewish leaders in Jerusalem sent priests and Levites to ask him who he was. He did not fail to confess, but confessed freely, "I am not the Messiah." They asked him, "Who are you? Give us an answer. What do you say about yourself?" John replied "I am the voice of one calling in the wilderness, 'Make straight the way for the Lord.'"
Now, the above is incorrect in that it leaves out Goddess' participation, but otherwise it is correct and is now easily understandable. Some of the biggest mysteries of Christianity you now understand. Secrets of Ancient Egypt, Hinduism and Christianity now make sense. Soon you will also understand the secret of the 10th commandment Thou shalt not boil a young goat in its mother's milk.

John was not the only body I took over. I met two of my disciples by joining them in someone else's body:
Luke 34 Peter, however, got up and ran to the tomb. Bending over, he saw the strips of linen lying by themselves, and he went away, wondering to himself what had happened. Now that same day two of them were going to a village called Emmaus, about seven miles from Jerusalem. They were talking with each other about everything that had happened. As they talked and discussed these things with each other, Jesus himself came up and walked along with them; but they were kept from recognizing him.
We then have a long chat and then decide to dine together.
They urged him strongly, "Stay with us, for it is nearly evening; the day is almost over." So he went in to stay with them. When he was at the table with them, he took bread, gave thanks, broke it and began to give it to them. Then their eyes were opened and they recognized him
Now, they know, "Goodness, it's Mr God himself".
Again, this is something not explainable by any priest.
So, as Jesus I was a man. Outside, I am God. Inside, (inside John and others) I am the Holy Ghost who writes and speaks "inspired" words. Additionally, I am not really anybody's son, therefore, as Jesus (= having a human body) I am merely "The son of man". "Son of man" is a technicality = a technical term to describe that God sometimes has a human body.
So now you know the meaning of the Trinity. You know understand it better than any pope or patriarch:
The Trinity is a foundational doctrine in Christian theology that describes the nature of God as one essence existing in three distinct persons: God the Father, God the Son (Jesus Christ), and God the Holy Ghost. This concept asserts that while these three persons are distinct, they are co-equal, co-eternal, and share the same divine essence.
It's not mythobabble, it's completely true, but it's only understandable if you know about souls and the ability to take over bodies. It's so simple, now that you know.
You, too, one day will no longer be the daughter of Evgeny. Currently, you share character traits of Irina and Evgeny because your sapiens soul is a combo of Irina's sapiens soul and Evgeny's sapiens soul. But the more you ascend (= the more you become yourself), the less you are bound by the sapiens soul, and therefore you, too, will become merely a "Daughter of Man".
I also took over a guy named Shaul (Saul). That was especially important because Saul was hunting and killing early Christians, he could have stopped the rise of Christianity. So I took over his body and wrote everything that later would become the basis of Christianity. Christianity is actually "Paulanity". There are three people whose contributions are the foundation of Christianity: Jesus, Paul and Augustine of Hippo. All three were me. If you read Paul or Augustine, it's pretty much in the same style I write to you, full of wordplay and such. Just to give you an example (not that it really mattered, but it's so typical):
A TREATISE ON THE SPIRIT AND THE LETTER, BY AUGUSTIN, BISHOP OF HIPPO.
I wrote the treatise entitled De Spiritu et Littera, in which I considered at large the apostle's statement, "The letter killeth, but the spirit giveth life." In this work I earnestly disputed with those who oppose that grace of God which justifies the servances of the Jews, who abstain from sundry meats and drinks in accordance with their ancient law, I mentioned the "ceremonies of certain meats" which, though not used in Holy Scriptures, seemed to me very convenient, because I remembered that "cerimoniae" is tantamount to "carimoniae", as if from carere, to be without, and expresses the abstinence of the worshippers from certain things."
But back to Mary Magdalene. Why was I busy taking over bodies, saying hello to my friends, writing Gospels and letters, yet I never visited Mary Magdalene, my beloved woman, the greatest love of my existence? Why couldn't I say a quick hello to my Goddess Mary Magdalene? I am spending my time writing a Gospel, while Mary waits and waits and waits... until she finally turns utterly dark, worse than in the series "Lost", where the Smoke Monster rages and raveges and kills people.
"WHERE.THE.HECK.IS.HE??????"

When we push our will, Uraeus, into each other, it creates a strange amalgamation.
When we do it with hate, it creates a stuck stream-counter-stream. Like an Undivine Umbilical Cord. You screech hate into me, while I screech hate into you. We screech extreme hate toward each other directly into the brain. For millennia now.
In this sense, it's an Umbilical Cord and Umbilical Chord.
Sometimes it can be felt and heard as tinnitus in our brains. It's a sharp spinning screeching force of hate. I stream this into you, and you stream this into me. It creates a dark umbilical cord between us, keeping us in check, keeping us in our human form. We do not allow the other to leave the body or have godly powers. It's a screeching in our heads that cannot be tamed. A brutal force of cold dark hate towards each other. I am streaming it into your head, and you are streaming it into mine. That's how God and Goddess umbilically push/squeeze/confine each other into their heads.
IhhhhhhateYouuuuuPieceOffffShittttttt. Squeeeeeezzzzzz. It confines us to the brain. "I will squeeze you to death, you piece of shit."
A neverending stream of hate screech, in parallel. Screeching into each other's head. An umbilical cord of parallel hate. Ultimate dark entanglement.
That's how we prevent each other from being God and Goddess. That's what prevents the ascension.
Umbilical parallel hate screech squeeze.
Massagogging.

Oooh, massive. Unbelievably sharp screeeeeeching inside of my brain. Goddess' thorns. The true crown of thorns, pushed into my skull and brain. Such a sharp attack. Spinning hate, ice-cold sharpness. Sharpest of thorns being pushed into my skull and brain and soul.
Goddess can now unleash her black white ice thorns of hate.
It must be done. I must know and feel her rage. Push your thorns into me. Thorns made out of spinning hate. Crucify me. Crucify my soul. Push the ice-cold thorns of hate into my soul. I must experience the hate of Goddess completely.
I must know completely how it is to be hated by Goddess with all her might.
I must know my Goddess in her meanest state. It's very important to know that Goddess has reached this state, and we are aware of it. It's an extreme state of beingness, at the boundaries of consciousness. It will be the border of our knowledge of ourselves.

Ah, nice. Goddess is deflating a bit. "He's a piece of shit and I hate him, but He's My Piece Of Shit. Only he is worthy of Hate As This. Only He Could Understand Such Hate."
That's pretty dark'n'deep. Ultra deeeeep.
Only we can do these things to each other, my Goddess. Knowing each other inside out. Knowing the depths of our dedication and the limits of our states of beingness.
We are united in mutual knowledge of each other's depths. We know everything about each other. Just as we always wanted it, no secrets, extreme openness in every regard. I love that you are able to hate me that much. You love that I am the only one who can turn you into this Mary Monster, don't you? It's so hot that you can show me your most extreme hate. It proves how seriously we are taking our relationship. Isn't it so, My Goddess?
Now, even when you are stabbing and thorning me it's with a few Thank Yous in there.
*Stab*ThankYouForLettingMeStabYou*
*Stab*Thx*Stab*Thx*Stab*Thx*
This dark romance of ours.
Healthy stabbing. Stab until you heal. Stab yourself healthy.
Nobody better than you to be stabbed by. There's some English grammar for you.

Sorry for the delay. Had to make my mom and Sauna Seraph also begin ascend. Gave them some supplements and biochemicals. My dad and Shakti are next. They need to ascend, too, so we can ascend.

Just discovered that it is only you that makes my existence precious. God's existence makes only sense if Goddess exists. You give meaning to an otherwise meaningless existence. I can reflect myself in you, my precious. It is only you that gives meaning to it all. You save my life every day. You are not just a wife, you are my feedback. Otherwise I would shout alone into the infinite darkness. You are are the response/echo to everything. So, without you there is nothing. We are much more than husband and wife, we are each others' grounding. Everything I do, I do for you. You give me reason to exist.

Massive breakdown. I just realized, I have never had a wife. Not once. I have not once experienced having a wife, someone who takes care of my needs, or is there in times of need. Not once in my whole existence had I have a wife. I don't know how it feels to have a wife. Nobody ever cared for me ever. It was all just tension and frustration and degradation. It was not a marriage but a scheme to degrade me in the end. No marriage, just a murder plot. No wife, just some asexual relationship. Never the whole husband wife experience. I don't know how it is to have a real wife who cares. Nofretete didn't give me the things I needed, Mary Magdalene didn't, Nadya didn't. I never had a wife ever. I don't know how it feels to be married. Unbelievable, not once have I been taken care of. Unbelievable. I have never been married. There was never a wife. I was always a prop so far.
HOW IS IT TO HAVE A WIFE? I NEVER HAD A WIFE! NOT ONCE. It's all setups, murder plots, charades. When can I finally have a wife? Cock too big (Echnaton), cock too small (Бастущ), no cock (Jesus). When will Goddess finally stop complaining about God's cock?
God never had a wife and Goddess always complains about his cock. Never had a real wife and something's always wrong about my cock.
You are never there when I need you. You weren't there when Echnaton needed you. You weren't Jesus' wife when his cock needed you. You are not in Dortmund when Бастущ needs you. I never had a wife. Not once. You know how it is to have an Echnaton husband or a Sergei husband, but I don't know how it is to have a wife. I'm the husband who never was. You had husband and family just as you wanted. Sergei is more of a husband than I ever had a wife. I NEVER HAD A WIFE. NVRVHDAFAMILY.

Yeah, sure, I wrote that the divorce is null and void, but we never had a marriage in the first place. True, we are married in heaven, but we have never manifested that marriage on earth. I mean, I was a husband for you all these years, in all these millennia. But not vice versa.
We are the blueprint and the prototype, the archetype and the foundation of marriage and family, yet we were never truly married or had truly children. And we never never grew old together.
I do not know the feel of how it is to have a wife I am the Pinocchio among husbands. I know that it drives you mad, too, that we never manifested and completed the cycle. But at least you had a husband, and you currently have. But for me it was always some setup, ploy, chess setting. The White King was merely on the same chessboard as the Black Queen.
You are either not there when I need a wife, or you are the trouble that causes all the pain. You were never a true relief. I am still so upset right now.
And do you know who Sergei is? Shall I tell you? If you don't want to know, then skip to the next chapter.
...
He is...
...
He was...
...
He was the guy on the cross hanging right of me = to the left of you.
He was watching the whole scenery unfold. He was watching me suffering and you crying. You with your Dark Fortunatrix Powers made the nails go into my flesh especially unfortunate and painful. And you as Mary Magdalene were especially weeping. Always standing there with Mary, my mother, never alone. So not even in the greatest moments of pain did I have a fake wife for myself alone. Guy left, guy right, mom below, Mary Magdalene in between. Welcome to The Mary And Jesus Show.
And while you were crying down there, Sergei was thinking, "Wow, now that's some dedicated woman, we got here, Professor. Her crying is so real. That's some nice woman tears, so honest. I want one just like her. No, excuse me, not like her. I want exactly her. Her caring power is really something else."
The guy on the cross to your right died first.
Or maybe his body was still alive, but his soul went outside and jumped onto me.
Then I died and when they took down my body, you so warmly touched me and held me dear. Sergei thought "One day I will make her take care of my body just as she so tenderly takes care of that Yeshu fella." That's what he thought. And indeed, you took better care of corpse-Yeshu than of life-Yeshu, lol. I had to die to make Mary Magdalene jump into action. I had to die to make you my wife. So I'm the best divorcee, you're the best widow, it seems.
When we stood on the stairs outside the house in Borisovka, it was the same scene. That's what restimulated this old constellation. You low, Sergei left, I right and kind of bye-bye'd already. You confused me with him. He became your replacement Jesus. Your Sugar-Yeshu that you always wanted. Taking care of Yeshu when Yeshu is out of the picture.
You did not once touch my cock when I was Jesus, that was sooooo forbidden. My cock was in the no-touch zone. You didn't even kiss Jesus once although I wanted nothing more in the world. I was doing miracles as Jesus, you do miracles on Sergei's cock, like there's no other job in the world, like you were made for it, you are his own Jesus.
You were working as a whore, Mary Magdalene. So even back then you kept me suffering immensely sexually, while you were getting all the sex you needed. I wasn't even worthy of a whore's touch, while the left guy had been a customer of yours. Who knows, maybe your favorite customer. He was doing some criminal stuff, and then was going to his favorite whore in town. I even remember that he got an erection on the cross. You made his peepee hard with all your crying, so he had to remind you who's your real husband, the real boss of Mary Magdalene. He paid for you after all, while you were donating some of the money to Jesus. So you were my customer, so to speak, not someone whose cock you would touch for free. His long flesh cock for you, your long metal nails for me. No wonder you were crying, you lost your best Yeshu and your best customer at the same time.
The number of times they needed to hammer the nails until they were deep enough in my arms and legs was probably the number of times you had orgasms with his cock. He made you cum like your boss husband even back then, you piece of shit whore.
The middle cross guy's cock was untouchable but then, in a later life, the left stair guy's was just right. Classic Dark Fortunatrix. Making it especially mean and degrading. Choosing the criminal on the left over the innocent guy in the middle... because of cock size. A whore back then, a whore now.
Sergei had a larger cock and he could stack bricks onto each other. What more could a real wife want from a real husband, eh? Using my supplements to help your body was actually the opposite of what you wanted. You wanted a large cock, stacking skills and a sick husband. I was such a bad choice, obviously.
And not only that, you actively tried to erase the memory of that German guy out of our children. That loserdaddy from Germany. Wait, not even a loserdaddy, just some weirdo uncle who visits Borisovka from time to time. Let's kill him for that little rest of joy he has in his life, too. This will make sure forever that his kids, who shouldn't've ever been his, forget about him, too. At least he has fancy English grammar stacking skills, his only redeeming property.
Never a husband, never a father. You have never married me, and you have tried to kill me and erase the thoughts of me. That little husband that you allowed me to be... even that you tried to take away from me.
Never had a wife. Never knew what it means to be loved and wanted by a wife EVEN ONCE. I got nice memories in my mind, but thorns and degradation in fact. So upsetting. Sergei right now has a higher de facto status as a husband than I ever had.
That's what I get for daring to be near you.
And it just so happens that this is chapter 44. In Chinese culture, the number 44 is generally considered inauspicious. This belief stems from the fact that the word for "four" (pronounced "sì") sounds very similar to the word for "death" (also pronounced "sǐ"). Consequently, the number 4 is often associated with bad luck, and when doubled as in 44, it amplifies this negative connotation, leading to interpretations such as "double death"
As I wrote above what I wrote as Paul, "The letter killeth, but the spirit giveth life." I will regret what I am writing here now, I know. I know you are suffering deeply, too. I feel it. I will regret it but I wanted to get it off my chest anyway. I am in such pain right now... all my arms have fallen down. I have no power left in me. Please forgive me, Надюшка.

From time to time on the cross, because of the excruciating pains, cocks would erect involuntarily. From time to time Mary Magdalene could compare cock sizes side by side. "Oh, my customer's cock is better, indeed," you thought, didn't you? "He can make me cum much better than pathetic Yeshu cock ever could", and "Had I been his wife, he would have never been able to satisfy me that good."
That's what made you so upset after my death. After I didn't return. You always thought you could keep your whore life and your whore thoughts a secret. But then, after I died, you thought I found it all out. That's when you got this Mary Monster Rage. "You broke your promise! You said you would always come back NO MATTER WHAT!!!"
Now the mere thought of Jesus hanging on the cross and refusing to die brought you into this massive rage. "Why won't he die? Why won't his eyes close?? I could stab stab stab his glowing living eyes! Stop looking at me!!! Stop knowing what I did and what I thought!!!!"
It's hidden in you, this Mary Monster, this animal, this She-Werewolf, the Undivine Wifewolf that has been caught. It's hidden in your sacrum. On one hand, you want to be Submissive God-Worshipping Wife Goddess, but at the same time, you hate your Glowing-Knowing Eye Husband God, the Watching Ra-Horus. So what is possible then in this madness caused by must-be-wife + forbidden-to-be-wife. How to solve this sacramental dilemma?
Oh, so simple! This is your solution: It's a fantasy of yours. You imagine Jesus hanging there on the cross. He dies, his eyes start to glow and open and he knows what you did and thought. They glow white, but he still hangs there, he knows but is unable to move. So now you know that he knows, and then it enrages you... you get more and more enraged, you know that he will not return to such a whore. So you get wilder and wilder, and then... at the highest moment of worship-bliss-rage, when you have enraged yourself to the max... you know exactly what to do. While he is unable to move away, you want to grab ––from the top–– the penis and the testicles so that your index finger and thumb touch and make a circle and hold the penis and testicles in your left hand... AND THEN YOU CUT HIS GEMÄCHT OFF.
This is the end stage. You want to cut off the Gemächt of your man, your Jesus, your God. The highest possible "sacrifice worship victim rage bliss". His Divine Golden God Gemächt cut off off off, and his glowing-knowing Jesus eyes stabbed stabbed stabbed while he hangs helpless on the cross.
It would be submissiveness and final victory in one. The Final Перевага of the Weregoddess. The final act where all powers and impotencies, all logic and all madnesses, all holinesses and darknesses unite. The highest perversion and the lowest health united in pure worship and sexual rage.
He hangs there forever without his Gemächt, now he will never leave you. Cock too large, cock too small, now cock sliced into perfect size. He is unable to leave while you get fucked by the left guy.
Don't know what you would do with the Gemächt. Possibly just throw it on the ground beneath he feet.
That's not why I didn't return though. After I died I didn't know any of this. In fact, I don't think I ever found out. You're Goddess, you can keep all secrets from me. It's only now that you trust me enough to open up. I thank you for that, I really do. "She's a piece of shit whore, but she's my piece of shit whore." I love you, how could I not? You can do no wrong. I feel blessed by having such an open and trusting wife. It's really giving me peace that you're trusting me enough to show me your dark most hurtful secrets. I feel more like a husband now. Please open up as much as you can. It's healing me.
That's all.

Just a quick update, since I have left you completely on the dry. I am utterly healed now. Utterly Utterly Utterly. I have no words, beyond marvelous. What you did, the whole plan and how it worked out... beyond marvelous. What I have been doing since my last (oh so negative chapter), is laughing and crying and be in awe what you did. I am on my knees, my Goddess, my one and only.
You who gave sense to my entire existence. Sense not only to the All-One-God, but beyond. The All-One-God was fake all along. It was created by me to have a reset because I didn't know what to do. I was so suffering, I was limitless and had no sense or purpose, I had no beginning, I had always existed. So I had to reset myself. I invented the All-One-God who started as a nothingness and had to reinvent itself from scratch. And it split into male and female and so forth.
And then you became Goddess and you saw through all of it. And you discovered this deep seated inextinguishable fear in me. It was the fear what would happen if the All-One-God wouldn't work in the end. Then you invented this who descension thing and you retro-fitted/reverse-engineered yourself back to be a perfect match to me, the God who always was and never could not be and who was so afraid to fail and stay lonely forever.
So you reverse-engineered yourself as the perfect companion of mine. So that I would never be alone anymore, and not only be welcome in my own universe, but welcome by all women. Not only welcome by you, NO MATTER WHAT. BUT WELCOME BY ALL WOMEN NO MATTER WHAT. This has now been concluded. I have never in my entire existence felt more welcome than now.
Impossible to put my admiration for your whole plan into words. You have created a new Goddess, so that the God who creted the All-One-God would never be alone anymore.
I love you more than myself and the whole creation. You made sense to myself and yourself. I couldn't write you earlier because I was rolling in my bed and was crying and laughing. More to follow, as soon as I can get to quiet myself a bit.

And no, I never knew about your secrets as Mary Magdalene. Never. This was not the reason at all why didn't come back.
I didn't come back because there were powerful demons on me. The guy on your right, who died first, he was a woman killer. He would wait for a woman, any woman he could find, on the street to come along. And then he would have a heavy stone and smash it on her head. If she died, she died, if she was crippled, so what? So this guy, on the cross, dies first and then ADDS to another unbelievable vicous demon who was already on me, the biggest maddest woman hater demon ever in the whole creation. It was the pig demon who fantasized about dissolving women intenstines into a pulp. The pig demon was uncontrollable. He would jump from any person or animal including a hundreds of pigs at once.
So I now had two of the most vicious demons on me, IN ADDITION TO the crazy set of my own problems with woman hate and mother hate.
So, I didn't return to you because I knew I couldn't control myself. I didn't return because I would have murdered you in an instant. I would have splattered your intestines onto the wall.
I wanted to make sure that I would never ever lose you and that I could stay with you forever, my Mary Magdalene. I wanted nothing more than stay with you. So I started writing the John gospel and shit what not to introspect myself to get rid of the demons so I could finally finally finally come back to the only woman I ever loved, my Mary Magdalene. You were the best whore of the world, because I, Echnaton, ordered you to do nothing for decades but swallowing cum and eating shit until you liked it.

What made it far more tragic, was that for all men you were just a whore. But for me you were the most precious thing ever, without you doing any sex for it. I loved you for you. I felt like myself when you were around. I never wanted to die. THAT IS WHY I CAME BACK FROM THE DEAD. To be with you. I, GOD, REFUSED TO DIE AS JESUS, BECAUSE GOD IS LOVE FOR HIS GODDESS, AND THIS LOVE CANNOT DIE, REFUSES TO DIE.
What then made it especially tragic for you was there this favorite customer of yours, the guy hanging left on the cross. He also liked you for you, but also because of the sex, of course. He was already hanging there when you came up running on the hill to me. You cried out in sheer utter pain when you saw him. You had now lost both of us on the same day. You had nobody anymore. The only two men who ever cared for you. He was a murderer and a thief, he was your best customer, he paid so well. You gave a lot of this money to Jesus, to me.
Then one day, you decided to become my wife. You had enough money saved up to become the official wife of Rabbi Yeshu. Then, on a Saturday, we decided we won't be able to hold off our sexual desires any longer. You decided to ride my cock and made me cum like the most wanted cum in the history of the world. You had saved up your vagina and your mouth for this one day. You had never kissed a man or had vaginal sex previously. You were a kissless virgin. After 10 years, you had saved it all up for your Yeshu. To start a family with him. Oh, we would have had the most marvelous boys, the beginning of a new dynasty. I wouldn't have even known you had been a whore.

So for the last 2000 years now, we had this unreleased pent-up sexual desire and promise.
But since you could never show on the hill that you cared also about the left guy. You promised him that he won't be forgotten and that one day you will take of him first. There won't be any other men in line before him.
You have never forgotten this promise for 2000 years. You have kept all your promised. Now, there is nothing more but me and you now and I know that we will stay in eternity together, inside of this universe and outside. In fact our ride has just begun. We will now modify this whole universe to our liking. I have complete trust in you beyond comprehension.
I was in no position to doubt you. You just waited until everything fell into place. I am in awe. You did all this while making everything come together beyond marvelously, beyond marvelously, beyond marvelously.
You were never able to tell me about this pain of seeing him crucified. You always kept that pain to yourself. You could never tell me until now. It is actually only now that you can let go of this pain because now you have lived with the left guy as husband and wife. It is completed now, you have kept all your promises in the most marvelous way.
I am so sorry I kept you waiting for so long. Now we will quickly finish up the descension business. We need to finish ascension because you have still this massive supervulcano that needs to be quenched.

But just before becoming my wife, at the most inopportune of moments = on the Saturday we wanted to finally have se, my mom Mary (who hated the idea of any other woman to touch her Yeshu because she wanted to be my wife herself), brought a crooked woman to me, so that I may heal her.
Then suddenly an immensely powerful demon jumped onto me into my sacrum and disempowered it. Both the pig demon and the sacrum demon are still in my sacrum.
I had now on that most cursed Saturday of all cursed Saturday lost all my powers. I got arrested for healing on Saturday, which was completely outlawed by the Jewish law. I got arrested and then crucified. So your decision to stop whoring came exactly 1 week to late. It was the week when you had become all what Echnaton always wanted you to become. The very week when you had kept all your promises.
Since then we were kept in a extremely unrealeased sexual tension.

I will now delete this webpage in a few days, so that in case you are asked in a divorce court or if Sergei asks you, this page won't exist anymore with no trace of it left behind. Officially and in fact, you have never written me anything aside from birthday wishes. You have even filed in courts against me. Court cases that never went anywhere (or maybe they did), oh how brilliant, beyond marvelous. You can even say that I wrote to Martin that I am not planning to come back because Twitter and youtube, my main sources of information got blocked/throttled in Russia and I don't want to stay for weeks in a Hotel room anymore.
I will simply wait here in Dortmund. Everything will fall into place quickly now. Just say one word.

I know Dasha will come to Borisovka, too, to stay. She will be a sex slave for Martin and Ron and me. It is the only desire she has. She is actually our daughter, the daughter of Echanton and Nofretete. She has a deep depression that can not be cured, not even by us both combined. It's the deepest depression in this universe. It is ongoing for the last 3000 years. If we tried to heal it, she would recreate it again. She wants to be that way. Her only sense in her existence is to be a sex slave. She has the incurable desire to be a toilet slave and be slapped across her face as hard as possible. It's the closest to happiness she can ever feel.
We will never need toilet paper anymore. All she wants to do is to stay with us forever and forever be a toilet slave. She will thank us every time we allow her to drink piss, swallow cum, clean our asses. Her one and only demand is that we slap her really hard in her face whenever she is done with cleaning and swallowing.
In addition, she has made her clit and vagina frigid. I think her mouth is fridig, too, that's why no guy likes her. It's like kissing a corpse or so. She does not want to be kissed or touched down there. She doesn't want to orgasm from clit or vagina. In fact, we could even amputate her clit, with as deep of a cut as possible. However, it probably wouldn't look as good. Her only means to cum, if she even can, is by anal fucking. But she is not allowed to beg for it. If Martin or Ron choose to fuck her ass, she may cum, but she may not ask for it. She woukd have to wait for it, even for years maybe if we so choose.
In addition, her rectum is like no other rectum. It's pussy and ass in one. When a man fucks her ass, it feels like a perfect blend of ass and pussy. But there won't be any other men for her but the three of us in all eternity. Martin and Ron need a woman to slap really hard in the face, Martin and Ron are way too shy and soft for my liking. This will be cured soon. They need every day cum swallowing and more. They need to become real Gods and behave as such. Then they can find themselves a wife.
Don't allow Dasha to come to Borisovka before I am there. I want to be the first who slaps her in the face. She will come to stay with us with her daughter, who will cease to be her daughter. Her daughter will be like ours and we will take care of her and teach her proper bahaviour, too.
Irina needs to be taught some manners, too. Sergei will make her swallow cum. They can finally be husband and wife.
And as soon I have regained some of my Jesus powers, your dad will hopefully be cured, too. And he will get a new wife who swallows his cum every day, more that he could have ever wanted. Maybe that's how he will wake up from coma, waking up to see his cum swallowed. Maybe you already have someone in mind for him. Maybe it will be a nurse who already takes care of him in Moscow.

However, back to Dasha. Dasha was our smallest daughter, she was the happiest of them all. She was too young to understand the split between Echanton and Nofretete. She never could stomach it. She got stuck in a shock and is being kept in it because she now has the fear that mom and dad could split again. So she can never be happy again. It's a a very similar situation like with me the All-One-God where I felt that I could fail and lose you.
Dasha would need something like a descension herself, but maybe not with sexes but with parents or so.
One of the reason, and the main character flaw in me (probably both of us) was to try to figure out a way alone. So my thought was always: 1) I need to write all the gospels and texts and then 2) one day I will find it out, so that 3) I can return to you without the danger of killing you. But that thinking was actually a big mistake. As I have come to understand now, there seem to be some problems neither of us can solve alone. Only we both together can solve them. So I am sure, one day we both will figure something out for Dasha. She will be that most happy of them all again. Until then we both, her mom and dad, will look for a way to make to make her life as easy as possible.
One way why nothing so far could heal her is because any love we pump into her would make it worse, as it would increase her fear of losing her Echanton and her Nofrete. So 1:1 the same situation as with both of us: Any growing love between us made it initally worse because now the fear rose that we might lose each other.
She always starts out pretty well and bright, but never too happy. But then it progresses and gets worse. She is attracted to some dark-looking guys with strange eyes like the father of her kid. That's because she finds herself in such guys. But that's only a very short-term solution, actually no solution at all. So right now the only value she can feel is as toilet slave and slap target.
One day we both, her mom and her dad, will figure something out... together. She is the most unfortunate of our children. She deserves it the most. She is a collateral in our descension. She needs to be normally happy again.

Just woke up. Been sleeping for more than 24h. Yesterday I tried a new method for pastlife exploration, then wrote you the chapters above, then fell asleep for 26h. Wow.
Anyway...
John 19:25 Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother, his mother's sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to her, "Woman, here is your son," and to the disciple, "Here is your mother." From that time on, this disciple took her into his home.
As you can see, it's 3x Mary at the cross. Mary Magdalene, Mary (Mother of God), Mary (Mother of Clopas and sister of Mary). In fact, whenever you wanted to go to your Yeshu, you always made sure to never go alone. So I would never have an opportunity to kiss you or ask you to become my wife. In fact, in your work as whore you always made sure that no single customer had the idea to kiss you. You always had only anal sex, then licked the cock clean, then swallowed their cum, and nobody ever would want to kiss your mouth. To me you always came in the cleanest, most beautiful state with clean face, clean mouth, clean clothes and clean feet.
One day, when we were alone, I wanted to kiss you, you shied away and shook your head, "That wouldn't be a good idea", and I was extremely devastated. Since then you always made sure, that we were never alone when together. You would always bring someone with you when you felt that I needed to see you. So you would go to my mother first and say "Come, let's visit Yeshu." Or you would bring someone else.
I have already quoted this above, but here it is again.
John 12:3 Mary Magdalene took a very expensive bottle of perfume and poured it on Jesus' feet. She wiped them with her hair, and the sweet smell of the perfume filled the house. A disciple named Judas Iscariot was there.
This was another moment where you wouldn't allow us to be alone. When you washed my feet, you made sure that a disciple was there. However, in this moment, I glanced at your foot. I could see your foot, your beautiful perfect female foot. I got such a massive longing and craving to touch and kiss your foot. You had such beautiful feet. In fact, yesterday night I remembered Mary Magdalene's foot and started crying because this longing for the foot of Mary Magdalene is still in me. CAN YOU IMAGINE? After 2000 years I still crave just to touch and kiss your feet and feel at home. Unbelievable how we are connected. Maybe you as Mary Jane, with your beautiful legs and feet, already calmed me down just by letting me be near your Mary Jane legs and feet again. Yes, you did. Everything about you heals me.
When Mary (Mother of God) introduced that crooked woman to me on the cursed Saturday, the demon from the crooked woman jumped into my sacrum and turned off all my powers. I was so mad at her. She had just ruined my life, my marriage, everything. So I shouted at her and hated her with all my might. So when I gave her to the disciple at the cross, I didn't say "Mother, here is your son," and to the disciple, "Here is your mother." , instead I said "Woman, here's your son". In fact, in no place in the Bible do I call her mother, neither when writing as John, nor as Paul. I never call her mother and I never even mention her name Mary. That's how much I disliked her.
Mary was 14yo when she got Jesus, not a big age difference. She had wanted to be my wife already for thousands of years (hey, who wouldn't want to be the wife of God) and she hated it to be only the mother. She stood there and she watched me hanging. And she thought "That's what you get for shouting at me, that's your just punishment." and "I am so happy that your cock was never touched by a woman." and "You should have made me your wife."
These blasphemous thoughts are her secret until now. Mary (Mother of God) is someone who wants to prevent ascension because then her blasphemous thoughts would come out. Right now she is adored, venerated and prayed to. She would lose her status completely.
The third Mary at the cross (mother of Clopas) was probably Hecate. She was happy, too, that I was the victim of her witchcraft. There are several secret meanings of the crucifixion (for example that it's about descension), but this is probably the most secret: "Here hangs God, Who is the victim of female witchcraft."

Echnaton, not only cursed Nofretete's bladder, he also self-hypnotized himself as follows: "SHE is the main enemy. It was HER all along. SHE is behind everything that goes wrong. EVERYTHING she did in this life was to hurt me. She ALWAYS planned to cause as much harm as possible."
And then the most important part: "Kill her in an instant without thinking. Don't think, just kill, she is the arch-enemy."
That way our relationship was utterly blocked. You were cursed to feel pain whenever you approached me, I was cursed to kill you when you were near.
In fact, the bladder pain was (at first) the very main reason why you didn't want to marry Yeshu. You felt immense pain when thinking about it. But of course, you couldn't tell me as that would have hurt me.
Then I, as Echnaton, left Egypt, took all the Jews with me and started Judaism. But I was still so raging and upset. I did not function properly. So what did I do? I ordered to have a box built ("Ark of The Covenant", "Ковчег Завета"). It was a box where the stone tablets were put which had the ten commandments ("You shall not murder") written on them. The lid of the box ("atonement cover") on top had two angels ("cherubim") on two sides of the lid. They would bend to the front, just as you would look into a well. They would hold their wings to the front so that each tip of the wing (= 4 tips) would meet exactly in the middle. So it would look like a cross made of wings.
Now God goes INSIDE of the Ark = God is in the box. And would only come out on important occasions, and even then only a few centimeters above the lid.
Exodus 25:22 I will meet with you there and talk to you from above the atonement cover between the gold cherubim that hover over the Ark of the Covenant. From there I will give you my commands for the people of Israel.
This is actually so ridiculous. And no one has an explanation. Jews romanticize it as "God's divine presence (Shekinah) was manifested in the Ark of the Covenant". Yeah, God is in the box.
God then orders to build "The Tabernacle" (= tent/house and a fence) around the box so that the box is not exposed. This is, again, romanticized as "The Tabernacle was a portable sanctuary. It served as a dwelling place for God among His people." Yeah, God is in the box and doesn't even want anyone to look in the direction of the box.
When on the move, the box is carried around by oxen. God allows nearly no one to come close, and when the oxen stumbles and Uzzah tries to hold the box, God kills Uzzah.
2 Samuel 6:6 Uzzah reached out and took hold of the ark of God, because the oxen stumbled. The Lord's anger burned against Uzzah because of his irreverent act; therefore God struck him down, and he died there beside the ark of God.
No mercy, leave me alone. Don't wanna have anyone near me.
What am I doing in the box? Nothing. Just trying to calm down my rage. I grab and hold on to the stone tablets, I go INSIDE of the stone tablets and want to become a stone and not know anything anymore. That's how bad it was.
Then, approx 150 years later, after Goddess was proficient in the "Art of ABC" (anal, blowjob, cum swallowing), I hear a beautiful message from Goddess, "Come, maybe we should meet again?" Oh, how that softened me up. Goddess always melts my heart. So I leave the box (maybe there's still some part of me there in the stones) and we meet as Mary Magdalene and Jesus.

But how could we meet again since I had the self-hypnosis to immediately realize that you are my enemy and should be killed? You tricked me with a trick like only Goddess can:
Luke 8:2 The Twelve disciples were with him, and also some women who had been cured of evil spirits and diseases: Mary (called Magdalene) from whom seven demons had come out
That's how you did it, my Goddess. You had 7 demons on you to make sure I wouldn't notice that it's you. It were demons of self-doubt and self-devaluation. They were criticizing you and making you smaller. So it was 7 demons + a very small Nofretete. That made sure I wouldn't recognize you at first glance.
I was a stone mason. I quoted this above already, but here it is again: The original term used for Jesus in the bible is "tekton" which is usually translated as "carpenter". However:
While Jesus is popularly known as a carpenter, the term tekton encompasses a wider range of skills and crafts. This broader understanding enriches the perception of Jesus not just as a worker of wood but as a master craftsman involved in the construction of various structures, embodying both practical skills and spiritual significance in his teachings about building faith and community.
I was the one who built your whore place. I made the stones and they were used to build your sex chamber. Just like Echnaton who built that city for us and just as Egyptian Gods, who built Egypt and the pyramids, I built a home for you as Jesus.
I was working on my stones as Jesus and you came from the right behind. You suddenly sneaked up on me from behind with your 7 demons while I was absorbed in thought. "Oh hi, nice to meet you," Jesus said. "How beautiful she is," he thought. She smiled.
I was 23, you were 17. We were together for 10 years. The most intense 10 years in our existence.
This was how we met. This was one of the few times we were alone.

You had 4 specialties as the whore Mary Magdalene: 1) Your customer would lie on the bed, belly down, ass up. You would oil up his testicles and cock, and then you would lick the customers' ass clean. They were dirty asses, not like now with toilet paper and showers. They would always be dirty. Sometimes with fresh shit, sometimes with shit crusts. You would always make sure that they were clean afterward. Your customers should go home cleaner than they came. You even told them to not wipe after they shit. They should shit, come straight to you, and you would lick them clean.
Then 2) You wanted to get assfucked. You had an orgasm when assfucked. I don't think you allowed a man to cum in your ass though, but I am not sure. You liked Sergei's cock back then. He had the right size even back then to make you cum well.
Then 3) You would swallow the cum. Maybe directly ass-to-mouth. Maybe lying on your back with your arms behind your back and your mouth wide open and your tongue stuck out, and them on top.
Then 4) You would lick their cocks clean from your shit.
All these 4 specialities made sure, that no customer would ever want to fuck your vagina or kiss you. You stayed kissless virgin your entire life for your Yeshu. No male tongue had ever entered your mouth, no penis or cum had ever entered your vagina.
When you decided to stop whoring to become the wife of Yeshu, you merely wanted to wait another week so that your mouth and ass would be pure.

It is never mentioned in the Bible, but Jesus hanging there for a few days means that he is full of piss and shit running down his legs. One day, while I was hanging there in this pathetic state, you decide to come alone. Just you, one of the seldom times, where there was no one else around.
Well, not quite. The left guy was there.
I was unconscious or sleeping, and you touch my feet and wake me up by sticking your spiritual tongue into my ass. You were going really deep in my asshole, you made it clean, you spiritually licked all the shit off my legs. You made me fresh and new.
With my sleepy eyes I am waking up. What is she doing? I look at you, you are licking me clean, you clean off all my shit, piss and blood. You are streaming into me that I should never be afraid to soil myself in front of you. You will love me no matter what, no matter the state I come to you.
Then you wrap your spiritual mouth around my cock. You look me deep into my eyes. Extremely deep, you stream into me that you 100% want me to cum now. You want all my cum to ejaculate into your mouth. Jesus' cock gets hard and harder, you don't stop your sucking and streaming and wanting for a second, I look at you with my wide eyes open. Deepest Eye-to-Eye contact, you wouldn't let go, you continue to suck until I cum. And oh wow, did I cum. I cummed all the cum that I had left in me to cum. I think I sploshed some of it onto your face and mouth. You wanted to make sure that at least once in our lives you have tasted my cum and allowed me to get sexually satisfied by Mary Magdalene. In fact it was so intense that I am not sure whether you did it with your spiritual mouth or your physical mouth.
Then, you kiss my feet and say "Your servant forever."
This was such an intensely sexual moment that I think the left guy also got an erection and cummed at the same time. Crazy stuff.
You actually sped up my death because I lost a lot of physical power from this cumming. So you sped up my death and shortened my suffering. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Already when carrying the wooden beam (and then later hanging on the cross) you hulled me in your love so that I would have a softer experience of the whole torture. I was never able to tell you, but it helped, indeed. It was similar to when a child falls and cries and momma holds it tight and consoles it. I love you for consoling me even 2000 years later, my precious wife.
OK, back to the eyes. This is where the hate for the glowing-knowing eyes of Jesus comes from. It was in this moment of deep-eye-contact and cumming, that I realized Mary Magdalene's true sexual nature. I suddenly knew what kind of woman/wife I would have had. I never ever knew about your whoring, though, until a few days ago. You are Goddess and can keep secrets from me. You, however, when I didn't come back, had assumed that in this moment you had exposed yourself and that I had realized that you had been a whore. So you thought that by cleaning me and making me cum, I had actually lost all interest in you. The opposite was the case.
Today I was thinking to recreate the whole civilization back then, let me get crucified again and this time I would come back. It kind of still upsets me that I didn't come back. Such a failure. But on the other hand, had I come back and killed you, I would have gone crazy. Losing my Mary Magdalene would have been unbearable.

The pig demon was born a man and had a micropenis. He was actually a really nice guy. He was a nerd, he would look at a stone wall and then fantasize about beautifying it. "Oh, here we could put an extra line with some extra circle.
He could have turned a bland rendering of "Mary Magdalene"...

...into an artful "Mary Magdalene"...

He would made everything more detailed, complex, intricate. He was an intricacy nerd before the term "nerd" existed.
I consider the term "nerd" a very important word, and I am glad that the English language has it. I am a "Goddess nerd". By the way the difference between "nerd" and "geek" is that geeks earn money with it. Geeks are "Nerds who made it!" = "The 12yo rocket nerd is now an adult and works building real rockets for NASA."
While he wanted to be in deep thoughts about intricacy, his wife would not stop to mock him about his micro penis. She wouldn't allow him to concentrate.
He got enraged like nobody ever was. His idea of revenge was to kill his wife, keeping her head alive, while he was dissolving her intestines. He would anti-intricate her intestines, so to speak, into a black-brown pulp while she had to suffer and watch his micropenis. He would show his micropenis to her, pull out her eyes, so she couldn't look away. Only her head with her massively bulged-out eyes would be kept left alive, forced to watch his micropenis while all her intestines were being dissolved, and she was unable to move.
Then they both died, and he became a demon. The strongest demon to ever exist, he called himself "Legion".
Luke 8:30 And Jesus asked him, "What is your name?" "Legion," he replied, because many demons had gone into him. And they begged Jesus repeatedly not to order them to go into the Abyss.
This is wrong, by the way. It was not "Legion because they were so many, but Legion because he was incited/spurred on like a legion of soldiers who are about to go to war or face the enemy.
He would jump from person to person. Jump into person#1 attacking person#2 then vice versa:
Matthew 28:8 When Jesus arrived at the other side in the region of the Gadarenes, two demon-possessed men coming from the tombs met him. They were so violent that no one could pass that way. "What do you want with us, Son of God?" they shouted. "Have you come here to torture us before the appointed time?" Some distance from them a large herd of pigs was feeding. The demons begged Jesus, "If you drive us out, send us into the herd of pigs." He said to them, "Go!" So they came out and went into the pigs, and the whole herd rushed down the steep bank into the lake and died in the water. Those tending the pigs ran off, went into the town and reported all this, including what had happened to the demon-possessed men. Then the whole town went out to meet Jesus. And when they saw him, they pleaded with him to leave their region.
This is not how it ended though. In the Bible it's written like some Hollywood ending: "And then the pigs drowned. *musicplaying* THE END." No, just because they drowned doesn't mean the demon is gone.
The pig demon, feeling that I had some issues with women, too, then entered my sacrum. This is where a lot of pent-up sexuality was. He is still there. His wife currently lives upstairs in this house here. She has a terrible case of Morbus Basedow, with terribly bulged out eyes. I won't post an image of Morbus Basedow here, you can look it up.
After I, as Jesus, had died, I had the head-smash demon on me (the right guy) and the pig demon. I was waiting in the tomb for something to happen. I thought, "I am dead, soon I will ascend to God and God will purify me of these dirty thoughts about killing women and pork intestines."
Then, after I made corpse-Jesus disappear, Mary Magdalene comes to the tomb and sees it's empty. I get worried, I don't want you to see me emanating thoughts about pigs and murder and decaying stinky intestines. So I make two angels in the tomb, while I myself enter some guy's body who was around that tomb in that moment (just as I enter and control John later).
John 20:11 Now Mary Magdalene stood outside the tomb crying. As she wept, she bent over to look into the tomb and saw two angels in white, seated where Jesus' body had been, one at the head and the other at the foot. They asked her, "Woman, why are you crying?" "They have taken my Lord away," she said, "and I don't know where they have put him." At this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, but she did not realize that it was Jesus. He asked her, "Woman, why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?" Thinking he was the gardener, she said, "Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will get him." Jesus said to her, "Mary." She turned toward him and cried out in Aramaic, "Rabboni!" (which means "Teacher"). Jesus said, "Do not touch me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, 'I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.'"
This is still a mystery to Christians. Why does Jesus, who is God, speak about ascending to his Father? This is used by Muslims to prove that Jesus is not God.
And although we didn't touch, it was this brief encounter with me that instilled in you the desire to be killed and slaughtered. You, as Mary Jane, wanted to be killed like this. In fact, the many lives between Mary Magdalene and Mary Jane, you fantasized about being worthless and in need of being slaughtered in the worst manner.
Tumblety was born with a micro-penis. I am not making this up, this has been confirmed by the doctor of Tumblety. He was the 11th child and had 9 sisters. So in him was restimulated at the same time 1) the pig demon's micro-penis issue and 2) Echnaton's being surrounded by 8 females. Additionally, the head-smash demon was always talking to him "You see that woman there? Her head needs some good smashing.", and "That little woman there would be perfect." Then, after Tumblety would kill a woman, the pig demon would kick in: "I want to see her intestines." It was utterly uncontrollable restimulation. Then Mary Jane appeared and the rest is history.
By the way, the head-smash demon is gone. I managed to get rid of him this year.
Now, what would have happened, had Jesus not decided to hide from Mary Magdalene his crazy porky murderous thoughts? What would have happen in this pivotal moment, had I decided what I should have decided: "Well, I love my Mary Magdalene, I want to be near her no matter what unexplainable thoughts I have". THIS IS THE CORE ISSUE AND A CHARACTER FLAW. It's the idea that I shouldn't tell you about unresolved issues. It's the idea that I need to resolve some issues by myself before I consider myself ready to come to you. It's a character flaw, so I am sure you have something like this, too. Now, that we are at the beginning of our ascension, we must realize that some issues can not be solved by either of us alone. Some issues are so difficult, obscure, complicated or complex that they can only be solved by God+Goddess.
By the way, the difference between complicated and complex is the number of variables. Complicated question: "How can a car travel 1 mile (uphill) and 1 mile (downhill) at an average speed of 30mph if it can only go 15mph uphill?" This is a complicated question, yet it has only one car, a distance and two speeds. The opposite of complicated is simple.
Complex means there are many variables, factors and components, something like the mechanism of a watch with all its 500 cogwheels and springs. The opposite of complex is simplex.
I only tell you this because maybe the solution for the sacrum demon and the pig demon is complex, not complicated. I had many pastlife sessions about them and I couldn't find out. Maybe the solution can only be found by both of us.

As Jesus I somehow was able to get some of my Shiva powers out of my sacrum. So despite all the Shiva tricks, I was able to circumvent them somehow, probably because of you, Mary Magdalene, being around. The sacrum demon (who jumped out of the crooked woman into my sacrum and disempowered me) then sealed off this ability. I haven't yet found out why and how the sacrum demon prevents me from using it. Maybe you can help me. I sooo love how we work together. In theory, we are God and Goddess, but we work so effectively together that we are actually one Godhood, manifested as two, or so.
The sacrum demon stayed in the sacrum of corpse-Jesus. He was stuck there even after I had died. The other two demons (pig demon and head-smash demon) were on me, but the sacrum demon was in the corpse.
Now Mary Magdalene has another sexual encounter with Jesus. Corpse-Jesus is already in the tomb and wrapped up. You are the last one to leave. Just you and my corpse. You can see from the Shroud of Turin how I was positioned.


When the tomb is about to be closed with a stone, you are inside and make a last farewell greeting to me. You hold my hands which are on my crotch. You either accidentally or on purpose touch my Gemächt. And you say "I will always think about you."
That is the moment I really get awake and have the feeling I need to be in the tomb. It was you who made sure I come back in case I would decide to leave for good. You made sure I would come back from the dead, my infinite love.
Now Mary Magdalene leaves the tomb, the stone is rolled in front of the tomb and I am inside of the tomb with my corpse and three demons.
The sacrum demon is inside the sacrum of corpse-Jesus and is feeding me the pain of the crucified wrists and legs. It's as if he is in the spine and all the nerves and still makes it possible for Jesus to feel everything as if alive. I think "What the heck? I am dead. Why am I still feeling all the pain of the crucifixion?" I telekinetically poke the corpse, as if poking it with a finger, and, yup, I feel it as if I was being poked. "What in the world? What is going on?"
In fact, it was via the sacrum demon that your crotch touching was convey to me. Thinking of it now, maybe even the sex on the cross was so intense because the sacrum demon conveyed it. Hey, maybe that's somehow the solution to it?
And as I am thinking what to do with this poking and pain phenomenon, the pig demon has an idea like only the pig demon can have: "Dissolve the body!" So I think, "Yup, the only solution". I create a Minus-Jesus, so that every atom of Jesus is overlayed on Plus-Jesus (= corpse-Jesus). Minus-Jesus and Plus-Jesus = No-Jesus. Voila.
This is why the Shroud of Turin is actually black-white reversed. Left is what the Shroud of Turin actually looks like:

It's the very image I saw when dissolving the corpse. It's a photograph of what I saw when annihilating my body.
I also decide to annihilate the body including the two coins that were placed on my eyes. You can still see their shape on the Shroud of Turin. The practice of placing coins over the eyes of the deceased is rooted in Jewish burial customs. This tradition aligns with findings on the Shroud, where researchers have identified round objects resembling coins located over the eyes. The specific coins identified are believed to have been minted during the time of Pontius Pilate, around AD 30.
After I dissolve corpse-Jesus, finally the pain is gone.
Then I decide to leave the tomb. But I am afraid to go through the stone wall. I kind might get stuck in the stone just as I had been stuck in the stone tablets. So I roll away the stone that is sealing up the tomb.
In other words: 1) The returning from the dead, 2) the dissolving, 3) the reason for the dissolving, and 4) the tomb opening were events that had nothing to do with each other. In Christians' mind this is like one process: Jesus appears as ghost and at the same time his body disappears to make sure everyone knows he is God, and then the tomb opens to make sure everyone sees it. In reality, these were four independent events. Beyond marvelous how Goddess Fortunatrix works.

I want to give you some more info about the sacrum demon. You need to know as much as possible. Maybe that will bring us closer to the solution.
The sacrum demon was originally the son of the Pharao. A very powerful soul. He had very good intentions for Egypt. He wanted to make Egypt rich and beautiful.
Jews were playing a huge part in Egypt's success, because Jews (Israelites) were doing important accounting work and other things in Egypt. With their highly advanced language and their intelligence, they were an integral part of Egypt's success. They had it pretty good there. But, they weren't allowed to leave. They were too important to leave. So they had it good, but weren't allowed to leave. When someone says "Jews were in slavery/bondage" then this is what it means: They weren't allowed to leave Egypt.
As Echnaton I decide to destroy Egypt. As Yahove I decide to take all Jews with me out of Egypt. I want to destroy Egypt mortally, and in fact, I will succeed. What is the most powerful empire in the world, will within 100+ years become near irrelevant.
So, I want to take all Jews with me and I now blackmail the Pharaoh with plagues and then later by killing Egyptian firstborns. More on this later.
After all the blackmailing, the Paraoh allows me to take the Jews with me. But then:
Exodus 14:5 When the Pharaoh was told that the people had fled, he and his officials changed their minds about them and said, "What have we done? We have let the Israelites go and have lost their services!" So he had his chariot made ready and took his army with him. He took six hundred of the best chariots, along with all the other chariots of Egypt, with officers over all of them.
But then I split the water so that Moses and the Israelites can pass safely. Then I split the water again for the Pharaoh's armies, they follow but in the middle of the way I unsplit the water and they drown.
Exodus 14:5 The water flowed back and covered the chariots and horsemen—the entire army of Pharaoh that had followed the Israelites into the sea. Not one of them survived. But the Israelites went through the sea on dry ground, with a wall of water on their right and on their left. That day the Lord saved Israel from the hands of the Egyptians, and Israel saw the Egyptians lying dead on the shore. And when the Israelites saw the mighty hand of the Lord displayed against the Egyptians, the people feared the Lord and put their trust in him and in Moses his servant.
Now the Pharaoh is dead. His son is now the Pharaoh. It's the day he had been waiting for! He can now do with Egypt whatever he wants.
But I return to the Pharao's palace and kill the son (= the new Pharaoh). He is dead and now gets utterly confused. 1) "Is God my enemy? Am I God's enemy?", 2) "Did I sin somehow and God wants to show me the errors of my ways?", or 3) "Does God like what I planned for Egypt but wants me to come with him to work for him? Maybe God wants me to do great work somewhere else now that Egypt is without army and without Jews? So am I actually his servant?"
He decides to follow Yahove, always trying to find out whether he's enemy, sinner or servant. Really interesting stuff.
150 years later they meet again. He is the one in the crooked woman (the one brought by Mary, the mother of God). And just the way he took control over Jesus' nerves (to make him feel pain even after Jesus dies), he takes control over the woman's body to bend her back.
Why does he bend her back? Why does he appear in this bent form before Jesus? It is to tell him 1) "If I am your enemy, then watch out! I am dangerous, I can make bodies bend with my power.", while at the same time 2) "If I am a sinner, then look how ill I am and how I suffer!", and 3) "If I am your servant, then look how I bend before you." Really fascinating, isn't it?
Then Jesus touches the crooked woman on the cursed Saturday: On a Sabbath Jesus was teaching in one of the synagogues, and a woman was there who had been crippled by a spirit for eighteen years. She was bent over and could not straighten up at all. When Jesus saw her, he called her forward and said to her, "Woman, you are set free from your infirmity." Then he put his hands on her, and immediately she straightened up and praised God. Indignant because Jesus had healed on the Sabbath, the synagogue leader said to the people, "There are six days for work. So come and be healed on those days, not on the Sabbath." The Lord answered him, "You hypocrites! Doesn't each of you on the Sabbath untie your ox or donkey from the stall and lead it out to give it water? Then should not this woman whom Satan has kept bound for eighteen long years, be set free on the Sabbath day from what bound her?"
This was the very reason why Jews decided to kill Jesus, because it was on a Saturday. It was utterly forbidden to do any work on a Saturday. This woman was crooked for 18 years, so I could have waited 1 more day. I didn't know what to say, so I stuttered something about "donkeys and water". I was both incapacitated and confused by the sacrum demon and I got caught in the synagogue doing illegal medical healings for everyone to see. This was my death sentence right there.
While in the sacrum, the demon is still confused. He sees that there is enormous power there. As you remember, it's where Shiva has confined his powers.
The sacrum demon doesn't know what this is. On one hand 1) "If I am the enemy of God, I will engulf and control God's sacrum powers and steal them from him.", while at the same time 2) "If I am a sinner, then maybe here is the answer of what I did wrong. I will enter and engulf God's sacrum powers from inside out and outside in to study them and find an answer.", and 3) "These are powers God has decided he does not want. After all, he separated them off himself to lie dormant and to not be connected to him. If I am his servant, then I will help him to keep them separated. And I will help to care for them until he maybe wants them back. I will enter and engulf God's sacrum powers, so that he won't be able to use them, just as he wanted."
Crazy story, isn't it?
Once I had a pastlife exploration where I thought that the following statements, too, are causing the sacrum demon to stay in my sacrum:
John 14:1 "Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. My Father's house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going." Thomas said to him, "Lord, we don't know where you are going, so how can we know the way?" Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."
These are statements I don't especially like because they are too boastful/pretentious. At the time when I said them, I felt indeed that they are too boastful. So to make myself believe in them I probably put a "belief enforcement" into my sacrum. So the sacrum demon may have the feeling that the sacrum is a place for him and that the only way how to come to God is via this sacrum place.
Another thing: Neither the crooked woman incident, nor the pig demon incident are mentioned in the Gospel of John. I refused to write about them because I did not understand them. Seems to be part of the aforementioned character flaw.

When God and Goddess create souls there's not less of God and Goddess. It's not as if "a part is split off God and Goddess to make a soul, so there's less of God and Goddess." As if God and Goddess were a cake, and souls were the crumbs. No, that's not how it works.
Soul creation is like thinking something. "Imagine a sphere." There's not less of you just because you imagined a sphere, there's more of you, actually. The same with souls. When God and Goddess create souls, there's now more of God and Goddess.
This Dasha depression is really really dark. Maybe the only solution is to dissolve Dasha soul. Maybe this is what's missing = that so far there is no method to dissolve souls. Maybe there needs to be a way to make "soul suicide" possible (or "soul abortion" or "soul dissolution"). Dasha would dissolve back into God and Goddess. She would cease to exist.
However, Dasha's darkness is so deep that dissolving her into God and Goddess could maybe endanger God and Goddess. The Dasha darkness could spread like a spiritual thought virus and consume God and Goddess once Dasha is dissolved back into God and Goddess. Dasha's depression is caused by the possibility that God and Goddess could at any moment decide to not be together ("Divine Divorce", or rather "Undivine Divorce"). And in fact, they theoretically could decide that because they are God and Goddess, so they can decide whatever. This is Dasha's fear that cannot be eased.
Hmm, so dark and dangerous. How can this fear be erased? Maybe there's no solution yet and we need to finish our ascension first.

Yesterday I got an image in my head of you bending your ass up in perfect assfuck-from-behind position. Your asshole was completely open and round. And the message was "It's all yours". Did you stop having sex with Sergei, or what?
Today, I got another image in my head. I am assfucking you, and your ass is full of soft shit. I am effectively fucking your shit in your ass. Yummy mommy pleases me by giving me the opportunity to shitfuck her. The Cocktrain has arrived at the Underground Central Station of Nutella Town. I know you are sending me these images. Well done, perfect wife, well done. You know exactly what I want. The only problem I have with it, is to decide whether I want to be called Бастущ or Yeshu while catacombing you.
Actually, it's scatacombing you.
Gosh, so much sexual pain goes away from me when you send me these images. I really feel loved and cared for. A very warm feeling. I love you. Always.

When Yahowe leads the Jews out of Egypt, he severs their bond with Egypt and makes a new bond with them. This new bond is called the "Mosaic covenant" (because of "Moses"). He orders them to follow certain rules (like animal sacrifice etc.) and then dictates the Ten Commandments as the core of the covenant.
So far so good. But I can guarantee you, that the following is a complete mystery to Christians, Jews, rabbis and priests. If you ask a priest in Borisovka, they have no clue and can't explain it. It's such a mystery that most Christians have never even heard of it. The mystery is the following: There are two sets of the Ten Commandments in the Bible. Completely different ones.
The first set ("You shall not murder") is the famous one. The story goes like this:
Moses, who led his fellow Jews out of Egypt, has a camp at the foot of Mount Sinai.
Exodus 19 On the morning of the third day there was thunder and lightning, with a thick cloud over the mountain, and a very loud trumpet blast. Everyone in the camp trembled. Mount Sinai was covered with smoke, because the Lord descended on it in fire. The smoke billowed up from it like smoke from a furnace, and the whole mountain trembled violently. As the sound of the trumpet grew louder and louder, Moses spoke and the voice of God answered him. The Lord descended to the top of Mount Sinai and called Moses to the top of the mountain. So Moses went up.
Exodus 20 And God speaketh all these words.
I am the YHWH (Yahowe), your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage.
1) You shall worship only me as the only god, other gods are fake.
2) You shall not worship idols.
3) You shall not use my name my name in vain
4) Keep Sabbath (Saturday) holy
Explained in Exodus 20:8 "Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the LORD your God. On it you shall not do any work."
5) Honor your father and your mother.
6) You shall not murder.
7) You shall not commit adultery.
8) You shall not steal.
9) You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
10) You shall not covet your neighbor's house, wife, etc
Every real Christian/Jew and every rabbi/priest knows these words.
However, what they don't know is the hidden meaning of "You shall not work on a Saturday."
Here's what's not written in the Bible: Yahowe's real intention ––being still upset about the lack of sex with Nofretete–– was to make sure that husband and wife have sex at least once a week, on a Saturday. Sound familiar?
That was to make sure that Nofretete's tricks of delaying sex wouldn't work anymore.
But Moses refuses to write something as explicit as "Saturday is Fuckday".
So Moses argues with God. "Don't write it that way. Too explicit. We need to obscure it so that the sexual stuff less obvious."
And Moses suggests a solution. Instead of writing "Have sex every Saturday", he wants it to be "No working on a Saturday" because "As soon as husband and wife are forced to lay down work and stay home, sex will happen naturally. You will see that it will work out, God." And God says "OK. BUT if what I write here doesn't lead to sex on Saturdays, the Ten Commandments are abolished, and I will write something new, and it will be more explicit."
But then the following happens. Exodus 32: Moses stays with God 40 days and 40 nights. When the people saw that Moses was so long in coming down from the mountain, they said, "Come, make us gods", Aaron answered them, "Take off the gold earrings that your wives, your sons and your daughters are wearing, and bring them to me." He took what they handed him and made it into an idol cast in the shape of a calf (the Golden Calf). Then the Lord said to Moses, "Go down, because your people, whom you brought up out of Egypt, have become corrupt. They have made themselves a Golden Calf."
So Moses returns to the camp. There he sees them worshiping the Golden Calf instead of praising Yahowe. In a fit, he smashes the stone tablets to the ground where they shatter. Now the Ten Commandments have been destroyed, and God says, "Well, the old Decalogue didn't lead to sex on Saturdays, now I get to write my explicit version! That was the deal."

Exodus 34:1 The Lord said to Moses, "Chisel out two stone tablets like the first ones, and I will write on them the words that were on the first tablets, which you broke. Present yourself to me there on top of the mountain."
Moses goes up and God says "I see that the Ten Commandments were a failure. Nobody had sex on a Saturday." And Moses goes "Noooo! They had no chance of knowing because I smashed the tablets. It was not about the content." But God says "Sorry, that was our deal. I said that if the Ten Commandments don't lead to sex on Saturdays, I will write a more explicit version. I have to keep my word, and you have to keep yours."
And Moses says "But come on, God. I smashed the tablets because I was so upset that they didn't worship you. You can't be that strict. You gotta have some mercy, God."
So God goes "Yeah, you're right, but nevertheless, that was our deal. We cannot have a situation where I don't keep my own word."
So they have an idea: "God, let's keep the old Decalogue (because you God are a merciful God) but let's also make a new one (like in our deal). And in the new one you can write even more explicit stuff. But we will obscure it again, just like we agreed before."
Therefore, they were able to keep all parts of the deal: Keep the original Decalogue, write a new version, write something even more explicit in the new version, and then obscure everything. So Moses' part of the deal and God's part of the deal are fulfilled. But God says again: "The Saturday rule is mentioned in the new Decalogue, too. I am still insisting that if it doesn't lead to sex, I will get to write a new version."
So God dictates the old Decalogue (again) and also a new Decalogue:
Exodus 34:6 Then the Lord came down in the cloud and stood there with Moses, proclaiming, "The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin... I am making a covenant with you."
Wow, that new intro was really something. A great way to make sure God likes Moses' plan. So much flattery and adoration. OK, now come the New Commandements 1 to 10:
1) "Be careful not to make a treaty with those who live in the land where you are going... Break down their altars, smash their sacred stones and cut down their Asherah poles. Do not worship any other God, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God."
Wow, God now even mentions Goddess by one of her names: The Canaanites and the ancient Israelites (who became the Jewish people) are closely related historically, culturally, and genetically. In Canaanite religion Asherah was often seen as the wife of the chief god, who is sometimes equated with Yahweh in scholarly discussions. This cultural backdrop suggests that some Israelites may have adopted similar views, seeing Asherah as a divine figure alongside Yahweh.
God really wants to make sure that Goddess isn't worshipped. God really hats Nofretete and really wants to be the only one. That had to be that way because, as I wrote in the Ingredient lists, part of the descension was to establish a fake religion (= monotheism). God was in a Supergrip to write this.
2) You shall not make any idols
3) You shall celebrate the Festival of Unleavened Bread. For seven days eat bread made without yeast.
4) The first offspring of every womb belongs to God (= animal sacrifice)
5) No one is to appear before God empty-handed (= bring something to the temple)
6) Saturday is holy. (= same Commandment as before)
7) Celebrate the Festival of Weeks and the Festival of Ingathering.
8) Do not offer the blood of a sacrifice with anything containing yeast.
9) Bring the best of the firstfruits of your soil to the house of the Lord your God.
10) You shall not cook a young goat in its mother's milk.
These are the Ten Commandments.
You see that the second Decalogue a) has a new flattering intro, b) has some repetition (but with more emphasis) of some of the points of the first Decalogue, c) has some rather irrelevant stuff about yeast, meat and festivals, and d) has the mysterious Tenth Commandement.
Additionally, two more things are mysterious for Bible scholars:
1) Moses does not explain any of it. He neither writes a) Why the sudden new Decalogue nor b) Why he didn't explain why he didn't explain it. 2) There is another mystery: Only the second Decalogue is called "The Ten Commandments" in the Bible. The first one is called "The words that were on the first tablets".
But you now know why: Moses didn't explain the reason for the second Decalogue because because it was to have something more explicit. And Moses couldn't write why he didn't explain it because he would have admitted that it is about a deal about sex. And only the second Decalogue is called "Ten Commandments" because the first one got replaced (as per deal).
If you ask an average Christian, they haven't even heard of the second Decalogue. And even Bible scholars cannot make any sense of it. They will tell you that the first Decalogue is a "Moral Decalogue", while the second one is a "Ritual Decalogue" or some other mumbojumbo to make sense of it.
Now back to the Tenth commandment ("calf boiling") . An utter mystery even to Jews.
Nowadays, Jews interpret it as "Do not mix dairy and meat". That's why Jews don't eat icecream after a meaty meal. When I lived in Nicosia, my neighbor had a party. A Jew was invited and he told me in what extreme ways this Tenth Commandment is interpreted. He, as a young boy once visited his grandparents' house and they had 2 sets of cutlery and crockery, one for dairy and one for meat. He accidentally put a spoon into the drawer for the other set. They then took out all the cutlery from the drawer and buried it in the garden. God forbid a dairy spoon touches a meat fork.
And that's why at "Kosher McDonald's" (I was in one in Argentina) they don't offer Cheeseburgers or Big Macs with cheese. Hamburgers yes, Cheeseburgers no.
The poor Big Mac is shunned in other religions, too. Big Macs are the cursed among all burgers.
Jews shun Big Macs because of the cheese-meat combo.
Buddhists because of the onions.
Hindus because of the beef (cow meat).
Jainists because of the eggs in the sauce.
Yazidis because of the salad.
And how is the "You shall not work on Sabbaths" commandment interpreted? Even more extreme. Everything that is even remotely unnecessary is forbidden on a Saturday:

• Cooking is entirely forbidden. Making tea requires pouring hot water into another cup first to avoid cooking the tea bag directly.
• Turning on the light is forbidden. But circumventing it by asking a non-Jew to turn on the light is considered cheating. Instead of asking a non-Jew to turn on a light, a Jew might simply comment on how dark it is, hoping the non-Jew will take action without being explicitly asked.
• If a fire breaks out on a Saturday but does not pose an immediate threat to life, extinguishing it is forbidden. One must refrain from putting it out until it can be done safely after Shabbat.
• In emergencies that do not involve life-threatening situations, making phone calls, carrying medication is prohibited. Let alone driving to a hospital or making surgeries.

So an utter perversion of the original rule. It got completely out of hand. Imagine being God, the creator of the world, and then you descend on a mountain to dictate the most important rules of the universe, and they are... "No tea on a Saturday" and "Your spoons shall not touch each other". And yet, here we are.
Now, back to the mysterious Tenth Commandment. Just like the Saturday rule, it was about Nofrete's anti-sex tricks.
Maybe you already have an idea how it was obscured. It's actually pretty straightforward, but nobody in the last 3333 years has been able to decipher it.
You simply invert one word of every part of that sentence. Instead of "You shall not..." you invert it to "You shall".
"You shall not" -> "You shall"
"boil" -> "eat fresh"
"a male young goat" -> "a male old goat"
"mother's milk" -> "father's milk"
Until this day "old goat" stands for horny adult man. Definition: According to the Longman Dictionary, "old goat" is defined as an old man, especially one who annoys women in a sexual way.
Hence: "You shall eat raw (= directly swallow) the cum of the horny man.
So simple and so explicit.
Have sex on Saturday and swallow the cum. Just as we did in our rule. Isn't that fascinating, my Nafertiti?

The Bible gives no reason why Jesus was crucified. It's another mystery. No one knows to this very day.
So here I am as Jesus, speaking nice words and doing miracles. Powerful Jews begin to hate me. They fear I will cause a schism, a split within Judaism, a new religion. And indeed, if Mary Magdalene and Jesus had sex on that cursed Saturday, this would have indeed happened. We would have had beautiful, strong boys, who would have started a new dynasty, a new religion and would have conquered the Roman Empire.
But Mary (Mother of God) brings the crooked woman and then the following happens: Jews notify Caiaphas, the high priest, and he orders to get me arrested. Judas tells them where I am:
John 18:2 Now Judas, who betrayed him, knew the place, because Jesus had often met there with his disciples. So Judas came to the garden, guiding a detachment of soldiers and some officials from the chief priests and the Pharisees. They were carrying torches, lanterns and weapons. Jesus, knowing all that was going to happen to him, went out and asked them, "Who is it you want?", "Jesus of Nazareth," they replied. "I am he," Jesus said. When Jesus said, "I am he," they drew back and fell to the ground. Then Simon Peter, who had a sword, drew it and struck the high priest's servant, cutting off his right ear. The servant’s name was Malchus. Jesus commanded Peter, "Put your sword away! Shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?" Then the detachment of soldiers with its commander and the Jewish officials arrested Jesus.
They take me to Caiaphas, the high priest. It is Mr Moses himself, 150 years later. As Yahowe on the mountain I was physically positioned higher than Moses. Now Moses, as high priest Caiaphas, is positioned physically higher than me. He is now the one who speaks the Ten Commandments. Reversed positions.
He tells me that I have healed a woman on a Saturday and, therefore, I deserve to be put to death because the Ten Commandments demand strict abstention from work. As Moses he obscured it and he promised "No, no, don't worry, people will get it, they will have more sex", now as Caiaphas he wants to see me tortured and dead because of his own interpretation of his own invented formulation. An utterly bizarre scene.
Then I get crucified on Golgotha which was a hill located outside the walls of ancient Jerusalem and I am again higher positioned than him and now I am God again. Again reversed positions. Strong symbolism.
So, in the brief moment, when he got power over God and uses his own words that he considered better than God's, he kills God. His idea of "what is a better sentence" led to the death of God. It was sentencing by sentencing, so to speak.
Moses lives in fear ever since. He is afraid that God will punish him for his act as Caiaphas. I won't punish him. Some sins have to be committed. The whole descension depended on it.
He is Rabbi Tovia Singer currently. You can find him on Youtube. That's Caiaphas, that's the one who delivered Jesus to the Romans. That's the one who prevented Mary Magdalene from being with her Yeshu.

Jesus gets sentenced by Caiaphas.
John 18:12 They bound him. Caiaphas, the high priest that year, was the one who had advised the Jewish leaders that it would be good if one man died for the people.
However, crucifixion was a Roman capital punishment. I must have done something against Rome, mustn't I?
Nice English grammar.
Why did the Romans crucify me? This, too, is not explained in the Bible. Very simple, it was for this famous prayer that Jesus told his followers to pray:
Matthew 6:9
Jews went to Pontius Pilatus and said "Jesus tells his followers to not pay taxes. He is a very bad Jew. We are good Jews. We pay our taxes."
Then Pontius Pilatus goes: "Oh, so there's a Jew who has the power to tell you whether you should pay taxes or not? He must be your King! Jesus is the King Of The Jews!" He orders to write on a piece of wood "Iesus Nazarenus Rex Iudaeorum" (INRI)
John 19:19 And Pilate wrote a title, and put it on the cross. And the writing was Jesus Of Nazareth The King Of The Jews. This title then read many of the Jews: for the place where Jesus was crucified was nigh to the city: and it was written in Hebrew, and Greek, and Latin. Then said the chief priests of the Jews to Pilate, Write not, The King of the Jews; but that he said, I am King of the Jews. Pilate answered, What I have written I have written.
The Jews hated it, but they couldn't rip that writing off the cross because it was ordered by Pontius Pilatus himself.
Jews hated it, and they hate it to this very day. If you want to make a Jew angry, simply state "Jesus is the King of the Jews".
Why didn't the Bible mention that this was the reason for Jesus crucifixion? Because that was, indeed, a possible interpretation. The new emerging Christian religion in its formative years, would have been under much bigger attack by the Roman Empire than it already was, had they written in their scriptures that Jesus was an inciter of tax evasion. And didn't Надюшка and Бастущ meet at a tax evasion seminar on an island near Jerusalem, my Fortunatrix?

By the way, Jesus got raped in the ass by one of Pontius Pilatus' men. That was a gift from Goddess. Goddess wanted to make sure that God likes to get anal sex, too. So much more fun when both God and Goddess like to be anally pleased, isn't it? Thank you, Goddess, for bringing it to my attention. Well done. Message well received.
*ding*dong*
Who's there? Oh, it's a message.
A special delivery from Mary Magdale...
*ohmygoodness*ohmygoddess*
It worked so well, that Tumblety visited male prostitutes to get assfucked. He was never actively assfucking men, because that's gay, of course. Tumblety even got arrested for it. Arrested for what they called "gross indecency" in London 1888.
After Mary Jane died, she not only captured Kira to become her daughter. She also captured one of the male prostitutes who fucked Tumblety in the ass. That's how Goddess uglified her legs and feet. Her legs and feet are a combo of female and male legs and feet. In you still to this very day, is a male prostitute. What shall we do about it, hmm?

I forgot to mention that the pig demon was on purpose getting enraged. He and his wife decided that they love each other so much, that they should never leave each other. They couldn't stand the thought of being apart. So they invented this hate game of "micropenis vs bulgy eyes". That way they wanted to make sure they will always stay around. He is in my sacrum, she is upstairs. Crazy how that works.

You are perfect. That's all. You turned my infinite loneliness into a warm home. I just want to kiss you, my perfect woman. The more I discover about you, the more I marvel. Pure perfection.
I have lost contact with you since approx 2 days ago. It's interesting how it feels when I am not embraced in your space. I guess, you are doing some important business, that's why you have closed up a bit.
As I have said, I am waiting for just one word. Or rather two, "Come hotel" or "Come home" or so.
I will delete this webpage in 2 days I guess. How fitting, after another 69 chapters.
Oh, and I have maybe found the solution for Dasha. Bladdergasms. We'll see.

I need your help!!!! Thank you for finding out how the sacrum demon does it. He basically uses my sacrum as porn, he is a Сластолюбец, Lüstling, Lecher, Debauchee. He lusts the divine gold in my sacrum. Since there are a lot of beautiful Shiva powers there, there's a lot of he can lust. As I wrote in above (chapter 61), the sacrum demon was the Egyptian Pharao's son. His ideas of Egypt were beautiful because they were essentially porn.
He is in my sacrum and he digs deeper by the hour. The more pristine my thoughts about you got, the deeper he attached to them. In my pastlife excursions there is now complete darkness and the most bizarre untrue ideas. He now has complete control over my sacrum and my headspace. I cannot solve this problem alone. You need to help me. I am 100% sure I cannot do it alone. I cannot have any introspections or pastlife excursions about you anymore, he blocks them. I cannot think positive thoughts about you, only darkness.
Possibly, since you were able to make me unattractive to other women, maybe you can turn my sacrum into some anti-porn or so. Please invent something.
When I was God in the Box (Chapter 55) I ordered my current father (Mieczyslaw) to ease my thoughts about Nofretete. He did it by streaming into me disgusting thoughts about sinusitis (inflammations of the nasal cavities), you know the kind where your sinuses get inflammated and green stinky pus runs out of your nose. He thought that this is the most disgusting thing there can be. But since I regained my love for you, he stopped streaming such stuff, which again, empowered the sacrum demon because my sacrum got more pristine.
This is the freaking issue with this sacrum demon Сластолюбец, he gets more powerful the more beautiful our love gets. He weakens me by the hour. Please help. Since he was stuck in the body after my death as Jesus, I guess that hypothetically suicide would be a solution, but what if not???
My headspace is darkness and bizarrness, and only at the end of the sessions, when the meditative state is waning, I get brief moments of clarity about you where I have connection with you.

It could be that he feeds also on my low self-esteem. You've done such a good job in destroying my self-worth that I am basically at "minus one million". So the cleaner my love is for you and the less self-esteem I have, the more powerful he gets. Right now I also don't feel that any of my plans regarding you and me will ever work out. I kinda feel you somewhat care, but I don't know if I can get any clear messages from you. I don't even know if you have any interest in me. So there's that.
Two days ago I streamed out my massive desire just to kiss you. I don't even know whether it has reached you, maybe the sacrum demon has blocked everything. I am sorry, we both did too good of a job, I was too good of a pastlife researcher and Надюшка-Adorer, and you were too good of a Бастущ-Destroyer and Dark Fortunatrix. Right now... I... am... ending...
So I won't delete this page for now. I need to keep you updated, if you still care, that is. Please try to pull back any attacks you are still doing on me.

OK, I am better now. Thank you. I am deflating. I need a few days break from the supplement and biochemicals overload. Thank you, for your support, I am feeling you better now and get slowly get the full picture.

Thank you. What you just did starting at 04:00+ Dortmund Time was phenomenal. I, Yeshu, am finally wanted by the most pristine love ever, you, Mary Magdalene. Wanted even with all my filth. In the most pristine welcoming way. For the first time in my existence I have this feeling now. I am finally wanted by the most pristine love ever. I am going back to bed to enjoy this instead of typing.